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Thread: feedback much appreciated

  1. #1
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    feedback much appreciated

    Hello folks,

    I have to start out by saying that i've been interested in having a Hedo experience for a few years now, and although i've only found and joined this message board over the past few days the posts i've read have been very informative. Presently i'm going through a bit of a messy divorce in my personal life and i've decided to take a week away from reality. Just somewhere to go and meet and hang out with some cool people and let everything disappear for a little while. I figured that Hedo would be the perfect place to just let loose and be free...even if only for a short spell.

    I guess the reason for my post is that I have noticed that most guests of the resort are couples. I would be traveling alone so I guess I just want to figure out how well a single man would be recieved at Hedo 2. I'm a very relaxed and open minded individual and I know how to enjoy a party. I'm not obnoxious or rude, I have a great sense of humor and I appreciate and respect people and their point of view. I have no expectations of what could happen down there I just like to go with the flow. I mean how fun or sexy is a contrived or presured situation?? It's not!

    Anyway, I know i'm rambeling a bit here but here is my query/question... I did read one posting from the lady of a couple that was there recently and she made referance many times during her post that a single man had no place at Hedo and that she couldn't understand why a single man would go there. She accented this further by saying that there were a few single men there while her and her husband were there and her and her friends gave these guys nick names...creepy guy#1, creepy guy#2 and Creepy guy#3.

    I'm just wondering if this is the normal attitude amongst the people at the resort towards a man traveling alone. I ask this because I am not a creepy guy at all and I guess I want to make sure people give me a chance before ostracizing me. At the same time i'm not saying these guys wern't creepy because I was not there to witness their behaviour.

    My point is (and I do have one...lol) I am going down there with no expectations, I certinly don't plan on having nameless orgies with the masses and I have no desire to make anyone feel uncomfortable hanging out with me. I'm just interested in having fun (sexual or not), nice drink, sunshine and good chats with some new and interesting people.

    Please let me know if I am wasting my time. If people won't give me the time of day just beacuse I'm traveling alone i'm sure i can find a better way to spend $3000 for a week.

    I realize that this is a long message but I am just being real and sincere and would really appreciate any feedback that you fine people may have for me.

    Hedo 2 from May 7th to 14th.....

  2. #2
    Registered User AB627's Avatar
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    Too bad you are not going in June...I know at least one woman will be there who is single.

  3. #3
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    fair enough...if nothing else we would at least make decent drinking drinking buddies and talk about how no one else will hang out with us because we're single...lol

  4. #4
    Registered User ColonelPanic's Avatar
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    Alright, this is my take on single men.

    We've met a number of single men at hedo that are fantastic. We'll be going again in June of this year, and I know at least three of those single men will be there, and we are really looking forward to seeing them again (as a couple).

    That said, many guys go with very unrealistic expectations. From your message, it doesn't sound like you'll be one of those guys. Creepy guys tend to fall into one of several categories, in my mind:

    A) The guy who stares from afar.
    B) The guy who inches closer and closer to your woman.
    B2) The guy who, after inching closer to your woman, decides that she's a free for all to grab.
    C) The guy who doesn't even bother to inch closer before making his "attachment"
    D) The guy who declares, in front of one or all, that since he is here, the women should flock to him.

    All of these things, obviously, put a husband on the watch. This is NOT the kind of single guy we want to see.

    On the other hand, single guys who we do like (and love, for the most part):

    A) The guy who is clearly interested in being social.
    B) The guy who is a lot of fun, and not looking for pussy from any/every woman at the resort. This guy might be a better dancer than a husband. Fine, and have fun. But don't think that that's going to mean getting laid later.

    There are, of course, some (few) single females at the resort. They may look for services, as might other married women. But this is going to depend largely on whether you act like a creep.

    Because so many of the guys ARE creeps, you need to be prepared for people to be suspicious. Be yourself, act accordingly, and it won't take long for people to warm up to you.

    As an example, I know one single guy who was the "drink bitch" for a bunch of people for a day. After watching him pay attention to what people drank, being sociable, and clearly not acting like an ass, folks took to him and he had a great vacation.

    On the other hand, I (and I'm sure many others) can tell you countless stories of single guys who expect a non-stop orgy and are clearly annoyed by the fact that every woman in the hot tub isn't jumping to suck his dick.

    I hope this helps a little bit. This is largely caused by Hedo's marketing. And it's not fair to single guys. But I can tell you that (again, as a couple) we look at how people _behave_, and not whether they are with a person, or more than one person, or alone.

    A few anecdotes; we met a guy one year who had recently gotten divorced. His friends sent him down to Hedo, based on the marketing material. He had no idea where he was going until he got to the airport. He hadn't done research, and had no idea what to expect. He headed over to the nude side, and was a little shy. But it was clear that he wasn't a creep, and he had a fantastic time.

    Another friend of ours is single and in his 60's/70's. He's horribly charismatic, and we joke that "he sees more ass than a toilet seat." It's true, and while he's not even close to the best looking guy on the resort, his attitude is just right. We've watched other, far better looking guys watch in disbelief.

    Similarly, we had another single guy join us last year, who had no expectations of getting laid, and another who traveled with him, who expected it to be an orgy. Guess which one saw more action, and had a great time, swearing he'd be back again another year?

    Ok, I've rambled long enough. I hope this helps.
    Last edited by ColonelPanic; 04-29-2010 at 12:00 AM. Reason: Typo
    H2 Trip #10: June 14-30, 2014

  5. #5
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    actually that does help a lot. Thank you very much for taking the time to reply to my message and providing me with some quality information. From what you have said i'm sure i will fit in just fine. Like i said i'm not going down with one thing on my mind i'm going down because i think it will help me clear my mind and be free from real life for a little while. Thanks again!

  6. #6
    Registered User ColonelPanic's Avatar
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    For what it's worth (even as a married guy) this is exactly the reason I go to Hedo. Yes, I get to enjoy a lot of wonderful sex with my wife. Yes, I get to be naked, and do silly things.

    But most importantly, I get to leave my real life behind for a week and enjoy who I am, and what I want to focus on _right now_, as opposed to what I need to worry about a week from now, tomorrow, etc.

    Before I leave for Hedo, even I can tell that I'm a pain in the ass. When I get back, I'm far more relaxed, in touch with the world, and generally, a much easier person to be around.

    I'm glad my post was helpful to you.
    Last edited by ColonelPanic; 04-28-2010 at 11:59 PM. Reason: Typo
    H2 Trip #10: June 14-30, 2014

  7. #7
    Registered User CopNkitten's Avatar
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    Spot on with that post. Nothing more to add but we went to H3 in Jan and kitten took a fancy to a respectful single guy and we had him visit our room several times. Never happened before, but may happen again. Act right, have fun, and you will have a great time.
    Paul....
    Co-Hosts of kitten + angel's 15th Annual Spring Fling April 9th - 16th, 2022 (We will be onsite 4/7/22 - 4/18/22) http://www.kittennangel.com/

  8. #8
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    Your expectations and goals for your trip seem very realistic and you sound like the kind of single guy we like to hang with. I can't add much to what ColonelPanic said because that posting was right on, but it sounds to me like there's a high likelihood that you'll have a great time. One thing I would add to what ColonelPanic said is don't be a "shadow". I would add "shadows" to the list of "creepy guys". That is, if a female half of a couple pays attention to you don't be there right next to her every time she turns around for the next week. Mingle, socialize and have fun with people and you'll be fine.

    Quote Originally Posted by newfieman View Post
    Hello folks,

    I have to start out by saying that i've been interested in having a Hedo experience for a few years now, and although i've only found and joined this message board over the past few days the posts i've read have been very informative. Presently i'm going through a bit of a messy divorce in my personal life and i've decided to take a week away from reality. Just somewhere to go and meet and hang out with some cool people and let everything disappear for a little while. I figured that Hedo would be the perfect place to just let loose and be free...even if only for a short spell.

    I guess the reason for my post is that I have noticed that most guests of the resort are couples. I would be traveling alone so I guess I just want to figure out how well a single man would be recieved at Hedo 2. I'm a very relaxed and open minded individual and I know how to enjoy a party. I'm not obnoxious or rude, I have a great sense of humor and I appreciate and respect people and their point of view. I have no expectations of what could happen down there I just like to go with the flow. I mean how fun or sexy is a contrived or presured situation?? It's not!

    Anyway, I know i'm rambeling a bit here but here is my query/question... I did read one posting from the lady of a couple that was there recently and she made referance many times during her post that a single man had no place at Hedo and that she couldn't understand why a single man would go there. She accented this further by saying that there were a few single men there while her and her husband were there and her and her friends gave these guys nick names...creepy guy#1, creepy guy#2 and Creepy guy#3.

    I'm just wondering if this is the normal attitude amongst the people at the resort towards a man traveling alone. I ask this because I am not a creepy guy at all and I guess I want to make sure people give me a chance before ostracizing me. At the same time i'm not saying these guys wern't creepy because I was not there to witness their behaviour.

    My point is (and I do have one...lol) I am going down there with no expectations, I certinly don't plan on having nameless orgies with the masses and I have no desire to make anyone feel uncomfortable hanging out with me. I'm just interested in having fun (sexual or not), nice drink, sunshine and good chats with some new and interesting people.

    Please let me know if I am wasting my time. If people won't give me the time of day just beacuse I'm traveling alone i'm sure i can find a better way to spend $3000 for a week.

    I realize that this is a long message but I am just being real and sincere and would really appreciate any feedback that you fine people may have for me.

    Hedo 2 from May 7th to 14th.....

  9. #9
    Registered User Wyoswift's Avatar
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    Hedo is the place for getting away and there alot of cool single guys and girls. It was said just right on here don't expect anything and you will have better results. Be respectful and just go be social with that in mind and you will be just fine. We have an Amigo who went single this year and he was the life of the party, every woman loved him but only because he was respectful... truth be told I think he got more ass than anyone because of his attitude!!!

    Rock out with your cock out!!!
    Jam out with you clam out!!!
    Black out with your rack out!!!:

  10. #10
    Registered User Moorerotic's Avatar
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    Good post by ColonelPanic, but a few things I would add are:

    You don't need to be a better dancer than anyone, just dance. It's probably the best route for a single to find some lovin'.

    Don't be the "drink bitch". Being the "drink bitch" makes you look weak, and guarantees you no lovin' from an women in the group you're getting drinks for. Folks will be nice to you and hang out with you though, and that may make you look good to women outside of that group.

    Yes, a lot of couples have had bad experiences with single guys over the years (it really on takes one) so they are suspicious of you before you even open your mouth. Some can be won over, some can not. Try to determine which camp a couple falls into quickly, and move on with no hard feelings, it's their issue and not you so don't let it get you down.
    Adversity is like a flame, it melts the weak but it tempers the strong.

  11. #11
    Registered User duda's Avatar
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    Hey There, While i pretty much am in agreement w/ the above posts i would like to add a little.
    Personally I wouldnt go as a single male to Hedo. While all the above postings are true it is from other peoples POV. IMO and from what ive gathered from talking to a couple of males who traveled single is that while they maybe having a great time it is hard to not want to be w/ someone. You are surrounded by happy loving couples and i think the reality is that you may feel like odd man out. There were some fine examples of how a good attitude can take you far, but dont let that give you false hope.
    You say you have no expectations, thats realistic, but that doesnt mean that once your there you wont will be wishing you were getting some. I also think you will need to work fast. You lose 2 days in travel so you will need to hit the ground running.
    Using a site like this will help you to meet people ahead of time which could make all the difference.
    I guess the bottom line is the there is potential for some great fun, but at the same time its awfully expensive price to pay to be frustrated for a week.
    As much as i love hedo I couldnt see going as a single. I would just be to frustrated even though i already know not to have false expectations. I think if I went without the wife I might revert into some sort of werepervert. Nice by normal standards, but when that Jamican sun is full and your drinking for free surrounded by all that is Hedo. YA I would blow it for sure. Creepy guy #6 The werepervert.

  12. #12
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    All good post and info.. Also it would be helpful to you if you participated in some activities. Like snorkeling, scuba, tennis, volleyball, even reading a book on the beach. These will keep you busy and keep you from looking creepy. You have the right attitude for the resort. You should be able to mingle with no problem. Just don't let the occasional couple who will prejudge you bother you. Theres people like that everywhere......Just because this is a vacation resort doesn't make not nice people nice.. You will probably have the same feeling that we had the first time we went to the resort...... " what have we done? " But that feeling only lasts until you jump right in and get a drink and sit back and relax...... Once you find someon your comfortable chatting with you will be fine. Have fun and no worries mon.....

  13. #13
    Registered User magjoy's Avatar
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    Oh man, no dissin the drink bitch! I always enjoy that long lonely walk to the nude bar from the nude hot tub. There have been sooo many enjoyable conversations I've had with the bartenders and the one joining with me to help bring drinks back!

    The married folks play drink bitch, too yah know!

    P.S., if I'm the drink bitch for the night, don't expect speedy or even slow service...it'll be awhile!
    get to bar..order my drink, chit chat while trying to remember the orders and drinking my drink (I always order two drinks for me) ..chat it up and distract him from making his drinks...usually make him laugh with my antics... sometimes scheme with who ever was brave enough to make the run with me... all while drinking my 1st drink and then head back to the hot tub.

    If I'm the drink bitch during the day, the service is slower, SORRY!!!
    It's not a sign of weakness...and if it's late at night, some chick might make the run with you to have some quiet conversation.

    Ladies, the single men...they can be a LOT of fun if you give them a shot. And I don't mean in bed...

    Meeting people here before you go helps you out a lot, too.
    Last edited by magjoy; 04-29-2010 at 12:11 PM.

  14. #14
    Registered User AB627's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by newfieman View Post
    fair enough...if nothing else we would at least make decent drinking drinking buddies and talk about how no one else will hang out with us because we're single...lol
    Oh, pity. I do not drink. However I do enjoy being the DD sort.


  15. #15
    Registered User Moorerotic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by magjoy View Post
    Oh man, no dissin the drink bitch! I always enjoy that long lonely walk to the nude bar from the nude hot tub. There have been sooo many enjoyable conversations I've had with the bartenders and the one joining with me to help bring drinks back!

    The married folks play drink bitch, too yah know!

    P.S., if I'm the drink bitch for the night, don't expect speedy or even slow service...it'll be awhile!
    get to bar..order my drink, chit chat while trying to remember the orders and drinking my drink (I always order two drinks for me) ..chat it up and distract him from making his drinks...usually make him laugh with my antics... sometimes scheme with who ever was brave enough to make the run with me... all while drinking my 1st drink and then head back to the hot tub.

    If I'm the drink bitch during the day, the service is slower, SORRY!!!
    It's not a sign of weakness...and if it's late at night, some chick might make the run with you to have some quiet conversation.

    Ladies, the single men...they can be a LOT of fun if you give them a shot. And I don't mean in bed...

    Meeting people here before you go helps you out a lot, too.
    I'm not dissing the drink bitch. I'm saying that a single guy shouldn't be the drink bitch. I'm saying that taking on that servant role makes him look weak TO PEOPLE WHO DON'T KNOW HIM. If Donald Trump shows up at Hedo and plays the "drink bitch" role, he becomes the coolest guy at the resort because people already know he has a shitload of real world power, but the random single guy at Hedo doesn't have that social status ahead of time so he can't afford to give any status up.

    Married guys, who are going to get fucked anyway, and women, who decide who gets fucked and when anyway, can play drink bitch all they want.

    The weakness issue is the perception that potential female sex partners will have of a new man entering their social group. Trust me, if you are a single guy and an attractive woman you've just met tells you to get her a drink and you run to the bar for her, you've just lost major points in her eyes. Have her go with you to get the drink.
    Adversity is like a flame, it melts the weak but it tempers the strong.

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