Soft swaps or?

**precambrian** · 04-12-2009, 12:49 AM

My wife is interested in a possible soft swap scenario? We are trying to determine the best way to approach this. Can anyone explain exactly what a soft swap is?

**Vic&Toni** · 04-12-2009, 05:23 AM

Soft swap is where you have oral sex only with the other person your playing with. If your not certain about swinging then soft swap is a good start until you feel comfortable with swinging more or decide that it's just not your thing at all. Hope this helps

**precambrian** · 04-12-2009, 03:36 PM

I'm assuming this is a negotiable situation? My wife's idea of a soft swap is a bit different.

**Vic&Toni** · 04-12-2009, 04:31 PM

Yes this is totally negotiable. Just have to make sure that the other couple or single person is cool with your definition and your limits.

**partynekkid** · 04-12-2009, 06:46 PM

There are no real set definitions for soft swap, it can be anything from kissing and petting to heavier play. For us soft swap is anything with the exception of intercourse, actual intercourse is considered full or hard swap. The best thing to do is get to know someone and then when comfortable bring up the subject, if they seem interested pursue, if not, then back off so as not to ruin anyone's good time. There are plenty ready and willing to play.

**WishNa3Sum** · 04-15-2009, 03:49 AM

Going early July and would love to engage in soft swap myself as well as get the wife in tune with the idea. She always seems reluctant although deep down, I'm sure she finds the idea erotic and would love to venture out and suck down on another hard dick. Would love to meet and greet with a middle age couple that might help convince her to give it a go and let loose for once. Oh yes and let me enjoy a "fine tuneing" as well.

**h2ocpl** · 05-14-2009, 10:55 PM

Ahh the wife and I were talking about getting her a multi-hand massage from me and another guy if/when we go. That should be easy to find right? At least easier than finding a woman to massage me with her. Right?

**CopNkitten** · 05-15-2009, 09:50 AM

Im sure it wont be a problem at all.

**LNRyno** · 05-15-2009, 09:52 PM

We're going the beginning of June would like to make some fantasies (dreams) happen.
The first is to have another guy playing and sucking our her big tits. Maybe putting lotion on them or licking something off them. Having someone else playing with those tits would be a great turn on. Next would be to have her play with and suck another hard cock. I would like to fuck her while she has her tits played with by another guy or sucks his cock.

**1sttimefantasy** · 05-15-2009, 10:45 PM

Is anyone going to be there 1st week in June at HEDO III. My husband has a fantasy of another lady doing things to him that I order while he is tied up. Mainly soft stuff as we are first timers to ever step over, but if I feel comfortable would be willing to get into some harder stuff with toys and with me female on female as he doesn't know but this has always been a fantasy of mine to have another female give me pleasure. Totally green so would have to be patient and slow. My husband may enjoy a male doing some anal toy stuff. I really haven't had fantasy of another male, but may want to cross into that as well if I feel comfortable. Can someone please let me know and if so can I talk online to get to know you. I don't want my husband to know as it is his fantasy and I want to suprise him with it.

**precambrian** · 06-11-2009, 10:32 PM

Okay we are back from a family emergency. We are going to reschedule our trip and hopefully we can contact a few couples going and hopefully coordinate our trip if possible. My wife is wondering if we do participate in a soft swap, what if she decides to take it to the next level? We experimented and went to a swingers clubs just to dance. Later I dared he to do a striptease while dancing with another guy, and to my surprise she did not hesitate, and boy she was a big hit! She said she was incredibly turned on by the experience and was not sure what she would do during a soft swap situation. If anyone is interested, we are hoping to find a couple in our relative age group who are athletic and in good shape. Please contact us if interested, we are back to the planning stages again.

**EastWest** · 06-12-2009, 04:15 AM

Redacted

**Rob&Jo** · 06-17-2009, 12:22 AM

There are lots of couples that are looking for soft swap situations. The Nov. 14 - 22nd week will have several. Going to the next level will depend on who you start with. Some couples may not be interested in going farther, in which case they will say "no". If you are with a couple that is comfortable going farther but is good with the limits you set, they will likely be open to going farther if you wish. It also depends on how things go down (no pun intended). If you set boundries when everyone is sober, then your wife is fired up after several drinks, the couple may not be comfortable changing the rules until you have had a chance to talk about it when you are all thinking straight. In any situation, everyone should agree. Just remember, you are looking out for your wife and you need to be good with her feelings in the morning. The last thing you want is for her to feel you let her do something she didn't really want to do, which was your agreement.

**woodylynn** · 06-17-2009, 10:06 AM

Just have it talked through well in advance. One of the things folks find out after a little bit of exploring is how it really opens up communication. Lay out your ground rules in advance. What is okay, what would be okay if things were going okay, and most importantly, what is totally not okay. Have a word or phrase that seems innoculous to anyone around you but means, "i'm freaking out, get me out of here!" One thing that has suprised us is how many male halves get things going, but once going are the ones that get uncomfortable, and the couple had no contingency for this.

Always remember it is entirely about you two! we have not run into anyone that got upset with limits or when things just werent clicking, and if you do run into those folks, those aren't the types you wanna play with anyway.

Go make those fantasies happen!

**BigC** · 06-21-2009, 02:59 PM

My husband and I just had our first experience last week !! And because of our nerves and too much to drink our boundries were never brought up!! and my husband had some issues with a couple things!! So my advice is definetly talk about boundries before anything happens!!