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Thread: PolarBearGirl Loves Hedo 3

  1. #1
    Registered User PolarBearGirl's Avatar
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    PolarBearGirl Loves Hedo 3

    Polar Bear's Trip Report
    March 14th - March 21st 2009

    DAY 1 - SATURDAY

    12:50 on the plane, Somewhere between Memphis and Mo Bay.
    I must be drunk, I'm trying to calculate how much it would cost to
    buy a round for all passengers...Maybe I should stop listening to
    what the voices in my head say when I drink red wine.

    Lesson Learned Saturday:
    1. Four glasses of red wine on a plane make me REALLY happy.
    2. Immigration papers take longer when your drunk.
    3. Red Stripe tastes better while youre looking at the ocean.
    4. In your rush to get naked by the pool,dont forget to put on sunscreen.

    DAY 2 - SUNDAY

    Breakfast with A&A. You really can't get a better view for breakfast than the
    ocean and the mountains in the background. I love Jamaica, what a beautiful
    place!

    Back to the room to get our pool necessities. Meeting A&A and K&J for an afternoon
    of Lounge Lizard by the nude pool.Since I'm A.D.D., I got up after a while
    and wandered the resort a few times.I played on the boardwalk and tried to
    catch crabs (The sea creature, not the STD) LOL! Then back to the pool to
    evenly toast both sides. Still looking for a few people. I keep going
    to the desk and asking. WTF? Where are they?

    Played volleyball for about 2 hours in the Quad. I forgot to make
    Lee my cabana boy. Gotta fix that tomorrow. Lee is funny as hell, and
    His wife, R, is really friendly and personable. Great couple!

    Talked for a while with Bob and Patti. What a great host and hostess!
    They are the organizers for the Sun Coast Swingers Club, and March Madness.
    If you ever book with them, youre in for a trip of great friends and great times.

    Pimp and Ho Night! Not much participation, kinda surprised by this.
    Nobody here has any clothes to dress like a ho? REALLY? I was the Ho,
    with D and K as my Co-Pimps. K, you are a one woman Entertainment Committee! LOL
    J, I love how you just watch her with a smirk on your face. It's the quiet ones
    you always have to watch out for... The Co-Pimp in red (my honey) and I wandered
    off for some fun in a beach chair. The little tower that looks out over the
    ocean by the sand volleyball court, I highly recommend the spot. A couple walked
    by and hung out to watch the show. Why the hell haven't we been here sooner?

    Lesson Learned Sunday:
    1. It's difficult to describe people when everyone is naked. "The guy with the blue
    cup" really doesnt help.
    2. Touching yourself before you serve the volleyball gives you a better chance that
    that the guys won't be able to hit the ball. Lee, you're hilarious.

    DAY 3 - MONDAY

    Shannon got here today, but John is still missing. Asked again, the front desk is
    going to think I'm stalking him. Spent most of the afternoon in the pool drinking with D&B.
    Some couples were meant for each other. B, you're just the woman to give him hell.
    Keep up the great work! :-) W&C and A&K got here today. OMG they are fun!
    Pirate night was a B L A S T! D,D,W & B dressed like the Village People. You
    gotta love a group of guys who make up their own theme night. The Hedo Village People
    are much sexier than the original ones! W became the self appointed entertainment leader
    and was workin the loin cloth! You go boy!

    Lesson Learned Monday:
    1. Don't hesitate to tell someone "NO" A creeper extinguished quickly is a good thing.
    Just because I said "Hi" to you doesn't mean I want to fuck you. Ease up there
    little guy, keep trolling the bar and maybe you can separate a weak one from the
    rest of the herd. F.Y.I. - You must be this tall to ride this ride... And by the way,
    single guys get a bad rap. The worst creepers were the married couples who
    would not leave me alone. If they spend half as much energy on each other as they
    did trying to talk me into things, they probably would have had a better vacation.
    The single guys we met were very fun and were not rude at all.

    DAY 4 - Tuesday

    Lots of lessons learned today!
    Lessons Learned Tuesday:
    1. Going down the waterslide is like being shot out of a cannon. It's a 40 mph douche.
    2. Sunscreen in your eyes hurts like a bitch.
    3. I was WAY TOO WORRIED about the Zip Line Tour. THanks to A&A it was awesome!
    4. If it feels nice, do it twice :-)

    DAY 5 - Wednesday

    Today was a lazy day, drinking by the pool with W&C and A&K. Back to the room at 2:30
    to get ready for A&K's wedding at 4:00. (I never had to sober up for a wedding before, LOL)
    The bride was beautiful, as she always is! The groom on the other hand, was a pepto shooting,
    sweaty, shaking ball of nerves. Thanks for the invite! After an hour or so of being
    clothed and somewhat responsible( I video taped the wedding), we headed back to the
    Quad pool.

    It was fetish night! WOO HOO! What's better than a sex toy? A Home Depot apron and a
    tool belt full of sex toys! "I help in all departments" LOL

    Lesson Learned Wednesday:
    1. Get separated from your friends, they are hard as hell to find. But a stalker can
    appear and be in your face every 30 seconds. It's Day 5, If I haven't found you
    sexy enough to fuck by now, you should really move on.

    DAY 6 - Thursday

    The front desk doesnt have enough paper for me to write down everything that happened today.
    Breakfast, then lounging by the pool with A&K, A&A, W&C until it was time to leave for
    the Wet N Wild Nude Cruise. Absolutely the best money I have ever spent for entertainment.
    We cruised the coast line, waving at other tourists that obviously didn't know a
    boat full of naked drunks was going to float by them. The captain announced it was time
    to party, and there were no rules. W gets the award for quickest naked all week. I have
    images from that cruise that will be burned in my brain for the rest of my life -
    HOLY SHIT! I will never see a peeled banana the same way, or a Rum Runner. Hey W, REALLY?

    I got licked head head to toe by a French-Canadian at lunch today. This was part of the games
    played on stage during lunch, so dinner games should be very interesting.....

    Toga Night! Big Fun! Small Togas! My honey had a tent in his toga most of the night, LOL!
    Met B&M from Kentucky today in the disco, he is funny as hell. After all, No Guts, No Glory!
    Be careful of gravity when you drink, that shit will pull you down on the floor if youre not
    ready for it!

    Lessons Learned Thursday:
    1. Rum is not a lubricant
    2. Your dick is not a swizzle stick
    3. Real porn is not pretty
    4. Never wear heels in the hot tub
    5. Strap ons should be for women to use, unfortunately not always the case.
    6. "that will clump you up" That W, he's just chocked full of wisdom.

    DAY 7 - Friday

    Up early again to drink coffee with the group and piece together the events of the night
    before. It's out last day, so we are going to marinate in the pool all day. BTW Lee's
    dick is still following people around in the pool, even though he has been gone for days.
    Drinks and beer flowed all day in the hot Jamaican sun. I passed out 5 Hour Energy
    shots at about 5PM. What's funnier than a bunch of naked drunks? A bunch of naked drunks
    when the 5 Hour Energy kicks in! Dinner with W&C, D&J, B&J. Festive! Then back to
    the bar to meet up with A&A, B&M and A&J and a quick stagger up to the piano bar.
    Of course my honey couldnt miss the opportunity to take some pics while all of the girls
    danced on the bar! After a fun night of dirty sing along songs, we headed back to
    the Quad pool to laugh and hang out. We had a curb side seat to the freak parade (LOL)
    That was an event stuffed full of crazy. Mr.K decided that he was going to be inconspicuous
    and steal the ash tray from the busy people in the hot tub. That little show may be the
    funniest thing he did all week. We all went to the bar for a night cap in the nude hot tub.
    back to the room by 2:30, packed stuff until 3:30. Gotta go back tomorrow, BOO HOO!

    Lessons Learned Friday:
    1. It's amazing how many times you can hear the phrase "chin music" in one day and it's
    still funny. YOU GO D! They were just jealous!
    2. When you show K your personal porn pics from the room, you can make him spit his
    drink all the way over the bar. LOL! I don't think he was prepared for that...

    DAY 8 - Saturday, The Return Home

    Smooth and uneventful. For you Newbies reading this, I'm going to quote my new good
    friend Bob. Hedo is the great equalizer. "No matter how good you look, there is someone
    who looks better. No matter how bad you look, someone looks worse" So suck it up, and
    get your chicken ass out to the nude side right away. Bob and Patty couldn't have been
    any nicer if we were in their own home. Even though we were not a member of their club,
    they welcomed us with a gift/party bag and always stopped by to see
    how our newbie trip was going. Great people, great couple, great Hedo neighbors.

    We are going back next March. I hope to meet up again with all our new partners in crime.

    Lesson Learned Saturday:
    1. It's amazing how quick you can miss new friends.
    2. Going through immigration is quicker than trying to get a fucking cheeseburger
    at Wendy's in the Mo Bay Airport.
    Last edited by PolarBearGirl; 03-22-2009 at 10:41 PM. Reason: spelling correction

  2. #2
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    Great report - glad you enjoyed your virgin trip

  3. #3
    Registered User EnigmaEsnc's Avatar
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    I think that's the best trip report I've read yet.

    So looking forward to my virgin trip in November!!!

    Thanks, PolarBearGirl.

  4. #4
    Registered User hare2party's Avatar
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    GREAT trip report. Thanks for posting... DIF worse now


    www.cocktailsintl.com


    Drink up the Guilty Pleasures



  5. #5
    Registered User jimandkristy's Avatar
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    That was one of the best reports that I have read in a while. It is making our last 39 days go by that much quicker.
    Again with flip-cup??


    4/24-4-29 2006
    5/12-5/19 2007
    11/3-11/10 2007
    5/2-5/9 2009

    7/30-8/6 2011 First time at H2
    7-28-8/4 2012 H2

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    NJ Loves PBG

    Hey PBG! Great recap of our week together. Some of the Lessons Learned from each day had me rolling! Truest, though, may have been one of the lessons learned on your last day: it is amazing just how quickly you can miss new friends. After you guys left, we found ourselves back at the quad pool hanging out until it was our time to leave, and periodically looking around to see where you guys were. Just seemed natural that you & D should have been there. BTW, I (W), literally stayed in the pool until about 15 mins before the bus left for the airport. Got out, dried off, threw on shorts and t-shirt, grabbed my carry-on and left for the lobby. Gotta get every last minute in. Miss you guys and look forward to getting together again. And just for you, I'm doing my "crab walk" across the desk right now. REALLY? Yes, really!

  7. #7
    Registered User Newlyweds2009's Avatar
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    Great sum-up!!

    Hey girl...I have been looking forward to reading your trip report and you did not disappoint!! I am trying hard not to laugh out loud since I am reading this at work...We miss you and D and W&C so much already. Great friends are hard to find but "nakid" great friends are even harder...Really!!

    Let's book for next year...same bat time...same bat channel!!

    A&A
    K & A
    March 15 - 22, 2009

  8. #8
    Registered User lovingcouple's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Newlyweds2009 View Post
    Hey girl...I have been looking forward to reading your trip report and you did not disappoint!! I am trying hard not to laugh out loud since I am reading this at work...We miss you and D and W&C so much already. Great friends are hard to find but "nakid" great friends are even harder...Really!!

    Let's book for next year...same bat time...same bat channel!!

    A&A
    Hey Newlyweds2009, You know what the difference is between Naked and Nekkid? About 12 beers...and a shot of 5 Hour Energy....

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    Wink Hey PB

    PB that was great report. I guess you still missed us after we were gone. I agree Bob & Patti are great people. I hope we can go back next year.

    Did you find anyone else to jump on their back in the pool. (still miss that)

    I missed everyone the next day after we got home!!!!

  10. #10
    Registered User PolarBearGirl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by drwlms View Post
    PB that was great report. I guess you still missed us after we were gone. I agree Bob & Patti are great people. I hope we can go back next year.

    Did you find anyone else to jump on their back in the pool. (still miss that)

    I missed everyone the next day after we got home!!!!
    No, I pretty much only perch on top of you when I'm drunk.... LOL! Tell the boss lady hello from us.

  11. #11
    Registered User Newlyweds2009's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lovingcouple View Post
    Hey Newlyweds2009, You know what the difference is between Naked and Nekkid? About 12 beers...and a shot of 5 Hour Energy....

    LMAO...oh yeah the 5 hour energy drink...can't wait to get Nekkid again...I have way too many clothes on!!!
    K & A
    March 15 - 22, 2009

  12. #12
    Registered User weliveinvegas's Avatar
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    Thumbs up

    Thanks for taking the time to jot down your thoughts, 128 days to go....

    Ivy and Rick
    "Once you go, you will know"

    Ivy and Rick
    "AWOL 2016, Let's Get Together"
    www.awoltravelgroup.com

    Next Trip: Hedo II, 7/23 to 7/30, 2016

  13. #13
    Registered User mncouple's Avatar
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    Great report PBG. We had a great time with you all. Already missing you guys, and can't wait till next time around!

    Here's to (raising a Miami Vice) great new nekkid friends!!!

    C'yall next year. (or sooner I hope)

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    That was some funny stuff. I still think the Boat ride was the best and I agree I will never look at a peeled banana the same ever again. It was great meeting everyone and hope we can stay in touch and do it again.
    Last edited by nynewbies; 03-24-2009 at 07:28 PM.

  15. #15
    Registered User A & R's Avatar
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    GREAT report! Looking forward to our virgin trip - but it's not until November! Thanks for posting this...hilarious! I can't wait for November!!

    - A and R



    "Be good...but if you can't be good, at least be good at it!"

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