As I said to a couple of people while at Hedo, it is very rare that a 25 year old New York guy is the large minority in any situation... This was the case for this trip, and I knew that coming into it... my plan was to make the best of it and have a nice, relaxing vacation.....and BOY DID I!!! I have seen people on different sites, including this one, bashing single guys who go to Hedo and telling fabrications of Hedo life such as nobody wants single guys there and nonsense like that... I can assure you that this is NOT the case! I knew that after spending 4 days in paradise, i HAD TO come home and give a trip report. So without further ado, here is my trip report of my first Hedo experience! It will be long and 100% true!
Saturday- Woke up at 430am to head to the airport, got to Newark with no problem and went to check in and get my bording pass. My plan was to just carry on both of my small bags that I had with me, however as I went through the security check, I was told that 3 of my toiletries were too large to be carried on the plane (my lotion, lysol and sunblock)! I turned around and got my bag checked right as they closed the check-in process, just in time! My suggestion is to check with your airline to see what their size limit is for liquid products so you dont have this problem. I arrived at the Montego Bay airport, waited in line to go through customs while doing the "I wonder who is going to Hedo" look around. After customs, I went to grab my checked bag, which was conveniently right in front of me the second I got there! Everything was going my way so far! I got to the superclubs booth and checked in there and got my bottle of water. Within minutes i had one of the attendants ganja pushing. I went outside to smoke and had one of the girls selling something outside trying to pick me up already! I told her I was here for 4 days by myself and she wrote her number on a paper and told me to call her to come visit. I took it, being polite, but also knowing that I wouldnt be calling a local over to Hedo in my short 4 day trip! When I got back inside our bus was getting ready to leave. I was in a bus with people who were going to Hedo and people who were going to somewhere else. I met a really cool couple who sat behind me and we talked some and had a beer together when the bus driver stopped at a bar on the way to the resorts. Being that they were the only ones on the bus around my age, and the fact that the female was beautiful, I was really hoping they were coming to Hedo, but unfortunately they were going to the other spot... oh well! After they got off the bus, I spoke with another single guy who was an older gentleman and we had a nice conversation about the upcoming trip. Didnt see him again til the last night i was there! I arrived at the resort and checked in and got my room right away! I had a corner room in the 300 block with a nice quad pool view. I put my swim shorts on and headed down there to see what was going on. I got to the quad pool area and the nudes had taken over and were doing body shots on top of the bar! There were no seats around the pool so I did a lap around it and decided that I didnt want to look like "vinny or wally" standing around so I walked myself to the nude area. Still a little aprehensive and unsure, i got my towel and walked out to the dock alone and undressed and layed out for a few minutes. After a little while, I moved into the pool area, but still a back row, semi-hidden spot. I saw many couples in the hot tub with 1 or 2 single guys and didnt want to just go in and be unwelcome, but after a little time i told myself to just do it! I settled in just to the left of the stairs, next to a single guy who I honestly thought was "Nigel Gruff", the kicker from the movie The Replacements! I started to chat to him and then walked myself around the hottub in a semicircle introducing myself to everybody... Thats just who I am, i need to be friendly! This time in the tub was a great way to meet people! In fact, I met a few people there who I ended up spending most of my trip with! I met a really nice couple who was unfortunately leaving the next day, but they were really nice and we were able to hang out that day before they left and they told me a lot about the resort and made me feel really comfortable. Dinner time came and as I went to the buffet I figured I would be sitting alone but lucky for me I saw 2 women from couples that I had made friends with and they both invited me to sit with them.. conveniently, they were sitting together!Good meal, good conversation and it was a great start to the night! It was glitter night at the disco which I didnt have so I just put on some nice clothes I brought and headed up to the disco at around 1130, when I was told it starts. I walked in and saw 5 people in there... this didnt look so good! I had a red stripe or 2 and a little after midnight it picked up and started to fill up. I met "spayne" who I spoke to on this site and she came up to introduce herself and her husband to me and asked if I was enjoying my time so far. Very nice couple, and I thanked her again for her comforting comments on here to the guy who was trying to discourage me from coming. Danced for a little while, then got really tired but didnt want to go to bed without checking out the hot tub. There werent many people there but the couple who was leaving the next day was so I hung out with them for a little while and then went to bed.
Sunday- Woke up around 10 on sunday and took a quick shower, went to grab some breakfast buffet (apple pancakes were amazing!!) and headed down to the nude pool to spend the day laying out. Unfortunately, by the time I got there, there were no empty chairs anywhere near the pool! I went back out to the dock where I saw one of the nice couples I had met on saturday so I joined them and layed out on the dock for a while. Husband left for a massage and wife and I decided to check out the ocean water in the beach area. The water was BEAUTIFUL and warm! We were joined by another few couples out in the water and I was able to make some more friends out there who I also ended up hanging out with a lot on my trip. I got out of the ocean and went to the reggae cafe for lunch. Got some really good jerk chicken! When I got back I got myself a chair closer to the pool and layed out for a little while with a trip or 2 to the pool and/or hot tub. When it got close to dinner time I went back to the room and showered and got ready. I went to the buffet and ended up sitting in the very back with "Nigel" and a cool single guy "J" who I started talking to that day. After dinner I went back to the room to try to nap to save energy for the night. I slept for about 2 hours and then put on my khaki shorts and open button down for pimps n hos night.. didnt have a "pimp suit" so i just looked good! :-P It was also "retro night" so the music wasnt exactly my taste and although I enjoyed some of it and drank and danced for a while, I decided to call it an early night and turn in... I wanted to wake up early to get a chair by the pool!
I was able to finally meet the infamous "juicyberri" this night and "spayne" introduced us to eachother knowing we spoke on this site before the trip. She is beautiful and was very sweet and friendly... but according to her, her visit to Jeffrey, the bartender in the piano bar, made her not remember that she met me when I saw her the next day! ::smile::
Monday- Woke myself up around 8am and got down to the pool area by around 830 and got me a good spot in the sun! I set my stuff down and went to get a quick breakfast. Ate fast and went to start my planned day of laying out by the nude pool. I layed out for hours and got REALLY hot! I went into the pool and started talking to "Erica and Phil" who I made friends with on sunday when they came up to me and introduced themselves after recognizing me from this site. Within a few minutes, one of the EC's was trying to organize a volleyball game. Being a sports nut I was all about it! I grabbed the volley ball, went to the net and urged others to join me. It started with me and 2 other guys just volleying back and forth and before you knew it we had a nice 5 on 5 game going on! We played for about 4 hours straight!! This was A LOT of fun and I made a bunch of new friends this way also. After volleying ourselves out we got some drinks and hung out in the tub for a little before it was time to get ready for dinner. It was pirates night and I was excited to be able to wear my Tampa Bay Bucs, Derrick Brooks jersey and Bucs visor to the disco! "J", "Nigel" and I decided to check out the Piano Bar at around 11 while we waited for the Disco to pick up. We went up and there was a group of girls singing along with the pianist and 5 minutes of me being there they sang New York, New York which I drunkenly screamed along with, being excited and representing the NY! :-) We stayed for a little while and were entertained by these girls who ended up also being from NY and had 1 WILD one that was very entertaining! lol This was a lively night of partying, getting really drunk and dancing like an animal! I became the designated leader of the CUPID SHUFFLE, which is an electric slide-like dance that I LOVE. I will never again listen to that song or do that dance without thinking about and flashing back to Hedo! I danced for hours and then we went to check out the hot tub. We were all pretty hammered at this point so we made our way to the tub to chill out for a while. Again, not much going on there(dont believe the hype that there are wild orgies at the tub at night... it really is not the case! lol) and the crowd died down so "J" and I just decided to Bob Marley it up and both head to our rooms for the night.
Tuesday- Woke up MISERABLE knowing that this would be my last day in paradise! But instead of pouting, I had to make the best of every minute left! So i got up at 8am again, got a good spot poolside, got breakfast and laid out for a long time... taking advantage of my last day in the beautiful Jamaican sun! I chatted up with another awesome couple who were leaving this day and it was while we were talking when we heard screams and cheers coming from the rooms a little after noon. We realized that the chears were to celebrate President Obama's inaguration. Of course I wanted to watch this historical event, but couldnt get myslef to sit in my room and not spend the time in the sun on my last day! Besides, how many people can say that they were laying naked poolside when our first African American president was inagurated?!?!? I wont forget it! :-D I did speak to "Juicy" again on monday and we had a sober introduction and when she saw me tuesday morning she had me join her and her friend in some Bob Marley-ing as my "going away present". Like I said, she is a very friendly person and everybody on the resort knew and loved "juicy". I then went and got a Jerk chicken salad from the nude grill and it was AMAZING! They had another volleyball game going so I jumped in and joined the game. Another fun game but the sexy girl on the other side of the net who was playing with her chest before serving and playing air guitar on her leg and distracting the hell out of me when i was across the net from her made it a little difficult to play! :-P I had a 4pm massage appointment and gor a really nice deep tissue massage from monica. After the massage I went to hang out with some friends then went to shower and get ready for "the last supper" at Hedo! It was pajama/lingere night which had the best reviews so I was excited for that! We had dinner and then went to hang out by the bar. All day I was telling everybody that they had to come out and party tonight for my last night and pretty much everybody did! We pretty much had our whole "nude side crew" hanging out with our clothes on at the main bar and then also in the disco that night. I was very happy that all my new friends came out to party on this important night for me! The EC's held a lap dance/strip tease contest which I pushed little man "J" into. It was HILARIOUS and he was winning until "male contestant #3"(who wasnt technically a male) came out and won the crowd vote away from J. After a while more of dancing, which was hi-lighted to me with a CUPID SHUFFLE that had AT LEAST 30 people on the dance floor shuffling with me! Very cool! As it got later in the night, Juicy lost her friend so we went on a search for her and eventually found her and convinced her to not go to sleep on my last night and get up and come to the hot tub. We went to Bob Marley then went to the tub for a little while where i got an ovation from the crowd for some reason, probably because I was partying all night and everyone knew it was my last night. We hung out there for a little while then went to hit up the end of the midnight buffet. This night seemed more skeevy than the rest, as I practically played body guard for the next couple of hours keeping juicy and her friend out of harm from the skeevy local who kept following her around and the overly aggressive group of europeans who juicy had became friendly with until they got rude and obnoxious. It started to get late so I got them back to their room and went back to mine to sleep for the hour and a half i had until my 730am wake up call!
Wednesday- 7:30 am wake up call, bags had to be out by 8 and my bus was to leave at 9! Wow... what a MISERABLE, DEPRESSING morning!!! Exhausted from no sleep, I woke up, packed my bags and put them outside the door. I then took a shower, got dressed (felt so wierd! lol) and headed down for my final breakfast buffet. I got some very good banana pancakes and fruit and ate quickly in misery! I went back to the room to roll up a doob to make the bus ride go faster. I took a nice lap around the resort while Marley-ing and reminiscing about the great time I had and wishing I didnt have to leave! I got back to the dining area where I saw a lot of the people who I had been hanging out with so I went table to table saying my goodbyes to everybody and getting even more depressed! The bus got there at exaclty 9 and we were off on our way back to the real world. Nobody cares about anything else, and thinking about my leaving day just makes the DIF worse so I will end the report here.
THIS TRIP WAS THE BEST 4 DAYS OF MY LIFE!!! Although this report is very long and pretty detailed, it is IMPOSSIBLE for me to tell you everything, nor is it feesable! After all, what happens in hedo... I met so many AMAZING people on this trip and I hope to stay in touch with all of you! All the reports are dead on, everybody is friendly, non-judgemental, and just down to earth, AWESOME people!! There wasnt one minute from saturday to tuesday night that I was not glowing with happiness! Im sure if you saw me you can atest that I was ALWAYS happy and having a great time! This place is the definition of PARADISE and I CANT WAIT to go back!!!
I came home and had to wear slacks, a sweater and a jacket to a meeting 9 hours after getting home!!!
Leaving names out for privacy reasons, but newlywed L might have been the funniest character I have ever met and he has the best personality in the universe! Big man L, who was a lobster by the time I left, definately came in a close 2nd on the funny ladder! My single guys, partners in crime, wingmen, etc. "Nigel" or "P" and little man "J" were really cool guys to hang out with and we complimented eachother well and shared many good stories. Towards the end of the trip "B" joined our group while he waited for his wife to arrive later in the week and was also a cool guy. My volleyball buddies, T(who was the king of the EC's events), M (who shared my competitiveness and made the game more challenging), D(who actually started the game with me) were all really cool guys. Juicy and her friend were amazing women and I know now why everybody loves her so much. She really is the definition of a people person, she is the kindest, sweetest woman and is truly an ambassador to Hedo and somebody special. Last but not least the awesome couples! B&H, W&B, Ph&S(or E) :-), Pa&Sh, D&M and T and M from volleyball and their wives were all amazing people and I really enjoyed all the time I spent with all of you! If I left anybody out I am sorry, Its early in the morning and this thing is long! Besides, its hard to think right now with this awful!!!!!
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Co-Hosts of kitten + angel's 15th Annual Spring Fling April 9th - 16th, 2022 (We will be onsite 4/7/22 - 4/18/22) 
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