Making Rules & What Ifs...

[Amanda&Gradie]

We don't have a really deep analytical reason for taking a vacation to Hedo. We are very a open, fun loving, adventure (and by adventure it could be mountain climbing or getting the guts up to walk around naked for the first time) seeking couple and we are each others best friend. We (like most people on this site) are hardworking folks that have gotten caught up in the day to day aspects of work, raising our children to be good strong human beings, and the mundane BS that comes with "normalcy". For us, this vacation is simply a time to enjoy each other, make new friends and play hard. I think I speak for both of us when I say I don't want to know everything that Hedo has in store for us, (though the input on this thread and site as a whole is wonderful!)that is the beauty of the place for me. All either of us truely hope for is sun, fun, making some new friends and just simply being. I think that's what Hedo is to me: Simple. We are excited and smiling everytime we think of our upcoming trip. I am confident that when we return and look back, we will have nothing less than new friends, great memories and possibly a bit of DIF, because Hedo will be what we make it for ourselves. It's the only way it should be!! So many people on here seem very cool and fun and laid back...I wish we could end up there at the same time!

[JAnewbies]

caeled... you are too silly to take seiously...

[JAnewbies]

The newbies have so much to look forward and I am jealous. I can remember being 9 days away from our first trip. The group on here that was going to be at Hedo that particular week, started a countdown MONTHS before we left and each day was torture (lol)...

I hope you new folks are feeling the same way. Some non-related advice... dress up in some way every night. The themes are fun, but if you don't like all of them, then dress "Hedo" and that's anything you would be arrested for wearing to a club/bar at home. For the girls: Booty shorts, lingerie, cut off T-shirts and bluejean shorts that your ass hangs out of w/cowboy boots, or 6 inch heels... The point is that it's Hedo. Dressing slutty is too formal. Get naughty with it.

Guys, be sure not to let the girls make you look like a schmuck (lol)... You don't have to walk 2 steps behind them, while wearing Bahama shorts and a tropical shiirt. Get some things for yourself too. For a reference, check out www.abcunderwear.com and find some cool stuff for you. Better yet, let your girls pick for you.

[JAnewbies]

Okay so I've been watching these posts and searched through a gazillion old messages trying to find the info that I'm looking for and finally the floor has opened up to it here. So I'm ready to ask some questions. My girlfriend & I are going to be making our first trip to Hedo 3. I'm in my 40's and she is upper 30's. We've been together for several years. We are going of course for the sun and fun but also with the hopes that she will have her first bi experience. I want to point out that it is her fantasy and not mine but I am excited for obvious reasons! We would like to involve just another woman but realize that that would probably be practically impossible. We are not into the idea of completely swapping with a couple but are open to another couple with just the ladies playing. She doesn't want it to be just a drunkin orgy and first and foremost safety is the biggest concern. We obviously don't want to bring back any "souveniers" that we would have to see a Dr. about! Do STD discussions take place? I haven't been in the dating scene in years but know that this is very important now days but also don't want to offend anyone by asking them. I guess we want to know all about the steps it takes to make things happen. I'm sure there are many different situations that could come up but in general what and how can we make this happen? I know there has to be a degee of attraction but how do you know when another woman or couple is open to the same thing? I'm afraid she might be too afraid of rejection or just plain scared to do it. I don't want to be pushy. I want it to just happen naturally for her but should I get involved at all with it? I read your trip report JA and I guess that is the type of situation we are looking for. We have set some boundaries but really don't know what to expect. I feel like a teenager again trying to get laid for the first time. What do you say? What do you ask? Do you go over the rules beforehand with the other person/couple? What do you tell and really what are the chances that anything is going to happen? If something does happen how awkward will it be for me in that situation just watching? WOW..I'm rambling but hopefully you get the idea here. Help a man out here guys. Also any ladies that may have been in this situation could be helpful. Thanks

This is a carbon copy of what we were trying to accomplish on our 1st trip. Maybe we got lucky, or maybe it was persistance to have the perfect experience, but we got it. We got it right down to the finest detail.

We were OK with me participating a little, but the emphasis was on her. We knew the 3some thing would be hard to pull off, so we mainly looked for another couple that would hook up with us, so the guys would be presesnt and feel "included," but she was not seeking any male contact, so the focus was on the girsl. As you mentioned in your post, we were also determined that it would not be a drunk hook up that was sloppy from intoxication with only fuzzy memories.

We met another couple here on the forum and they were GREAT. They had a few expeiences under their belt and because we were new to all of it, this was a big help. We met through this sight, got to know each other a little bit through email and exchanging some pics of each other. It all just kind of came together after that. We met at Hedo and because we had already discussed expectations, fantasies, boundaries and such, we just went to our room one afternoon and went for it. We ended up getting together 3 or 4 times that week and every time it was great. She had a few mini makeout scenes with a few other girls during the week, after having a few, but no additional detailed experiences. If spontaneous things occurred for us while partying, we just dabbled a bit, but kept the "good stuff" for sober and clear headed times during the day.

I don't want to leave out that it was not my "thing" either, but I wanted her to experience it, because she had a curiosity about being with a girl that she had kept to herself for years. I am also the type that wants her to have anything she wants (as long as it's not with another guy lol), even if she is too unselfish to ask for it. Life is too short.

When she told me about her curiosoty, she was firm that she didn't want to actually do it. Her telling me just kind of came out one night. I won't go into the whole thing, but I was shocked off my ass that she had ever even thought about being with a girl. I did a lot of research and the most interesting thing I learned was that in studies conducted, 91% of all girls are either lesbian, bi, had had a GG experience, fantasized about one, or wanted to have one...

This was news to me and after learning that... I saw things in a different light. I actually felt better, because with her being in the 91% category, there was a lot better chance that she was "normal" (lol)... At any rate, it made me feel better and I really wanted her to have the experience and not look back when she was 75 and wonder what if, or have regrets.

To answer your question specifically. Try and meet some people that are going when you are going and have the same interests. Even if they are a "full swap" couple, they are still likely to be fine being naked on a bed with another couple in the afternoon having sex with only each other and another, while the girls are allowed to play with each other too.

On the std stuff, I will let others answer that. My fingers are tired. Mainly because I don't know how to type (lol)...

[midwestguy672]

Rumpunch,
The best thing you can do is to sign up with wild women vacations. Lots of couples with similar interests will be there if you go on one of their Wild Women weeks. Their website is www.wildwomenvacations.com and the atmosphere during their week will be perfect for you and your wife.

[Kelley]

Caeled...

If you think I was dissing you, then it's either because you don't know me, or you are too sensitive. Either way... I wasn't, but I am going to a little bit now.

If you spent your days reading under the gazebo and don't see naked girls as a sexual thing... I can assure you that you will never want to party with me. Me seeing a naked girl as a sexual thing, doesn't mean I get wood and want to jump her, just because she is there. Me seeing a naked girl as a sexual thing, is the same as my seeing the Grand Canyon as a big fucking ditch. That's just what it happens to be and I see it for that. Like I said before... I sound simple, because I am a simple man. Simple is a way more fun way to be.

My wife is pretty good looking, but I don't appreciate her being nude as a beautiful portrait type thing. I appreciate her being nude cause she's hot when she's nude. I imagine that if I did NOT feel that way about her, she would be insulted.

You see, "regular people" like to be desired. Find one poor mother fucker that says they want to be looked at while naked as NOT BEING SEXUAL and I'll show you the perfect companion for your next rip to Hedo. Ya'll can read naked under the gazebo together, while everybody else plays pool vollyball and does body shots at the bar.

I don't know what planet you are from. Why is it so important to you ... that I agree naked people aren't sexual? Seriously dude...

Everyone that knows me, knows that I am the least offensive, most fun loving mofo there is. I am loud, I am goofy, I am stupidly fun. I am the guy that finds newbies on the prude side and coaxes them to the nude side. I am the guy that orders shots for strangers and then drags them up to the disco. I am a Hedo fanatic and I am the most outgoing, yet least offensive guy you could ever know, so the idea that I am somehow in the "naughty wrong" because I see nudity as sexual... actually bugs the shit out of me.

If I was a girl, if I didn't light up the sky with sexuality when I was naked in a crowd... I would be PISSED!!!

I have a question for the girls here on the board and as those who know me know... I call all females "girls" cause I think it's sexier, but my question to you girls is this:

Would you rather be considered "sexual" when nude, or "not sexual?" I welcome the answers and stand ready to eat my words if needed. I have a fork ready.

Dude you don't want to get into this with me.

You are an arrogant asshole who believes midwest bible belt values are the entire world. You are not only entirely full of shit, your image of the world is so narrow I'm supprised you can see far enough in front of your ass to even notice your wife.

Enjoy your self centered narrow world. I'll enjoy my much larger one.

But frankly you can f' off.

Caeled, keep in mind the original intent of this thread, it was for newbies do's and don'ts, pretty much.

99.99% of anybody in the world who go to H2/H3 are exactly like JAnewbies described. Everyone is uptight the first time they go, and it may take a few trips to settle in to the Hedo experience the regulars talk about. The other, worldly 0.01%, including you, have experiences that are far more loose, nay, extreme than just about anybody. Please remember that not everybody shares your opinion, views, and outlooks on life in the pagan way. Many views, religions, what-have-you are represented here. Our pirate group has several people who are wiccan, and they're awesome.

I do believe they'd be shocked at your behavior. Especially since this is a topic wholly for the Hedo newbie's education and etiquette.

The cussing was uncool as well. We're all trying to be positive for everybody's benefit, and your negativity is getting in the way of that. Go be angry somewhere else. Hedo is not about that, neither are these forums.

[JAnewbies]

Preach on my brother... You are spot on.


Thanks Kelwa1

[Kelley]

Preach on my brother... You are spot on.

For the newbies that don't know how the "red box" quote system works... The top line was me... the lower lines were our intolerant addition to the forum, caeled... Just wanted to make sure everyone knew my quoted statement was the "nice one" at the top (lol)...

Thanks Kelwa1

My friends call me Kelley,

I edited above for better quoting content.

It pisses me off when someone gets all bent out of shape when someone else tries to help folks understand the Hedo way, as it pertains to the novice. Especially when they're talking about their first experiences, expectations, and learned do's and don'ts. We were all a novice at one point in our life, at some point in time, learning something new,,,,, be it school, job, or life related. I myself, have been known to be extremely succinct in my replies to newbies questions here and on other forums,,,,,,,, But I think I have friends telling me when I do so,,,,, so I can apologize to whomever I replied to in question VIA PM and not to dampen any enthusiasm,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, in any capacity.

Don't get me wrong Caeled, there are always exceptions to the rule. JAnewbies was general, you thought specific. It's Jamaica, and it's Hedo.

That being said, I announce pirate hijack over, and lets get back on topic.

All newbies, getting to know folks here by conversation BEFORE your trip to H2/H3 can be extremely wealthy for your social and private life while down there. I know, it's been said before, but it really is worth saying again. Knowing people, especially ones that will be there when you get there, is half the battle. What you do afterward is totally dependent on your attitude, your communication on boundaries, your actions and participation in the E/C's sometimes embarrassing poolside games, and your general bearing/well-being. You play and live it it well,,,,,,, you'll have friends for life.CONSIDER THIS A "DO". It's not mandatory, but the folks here sure can make your first trip better, by clues and tips about what to expect.

More later,,,,,,,,,

20 days until Gasparilla,,,,,,

209 days until
H3 Invasion 2009

AARRGGHH!!!!

[Just Doc]

Would you like a picture to burn and a chicken to kill so that something happens to us?

"I dont practice santeria" ....... I love that song..........

And Emmy and I love hedo and all the naked women running around there.....

hedo rocks!

[Solstyce]

Oh my god.... this dumbass is from Seattle AND wiccan?!?! Well don't think his opinions are the same as every other Wiccan's in Seattle!!! *sigh* Some people. And "the KING?!"?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?! Wow. JA- just keep on being yourself, you know we all love you. Woooooooooooooooo hooooooooooooo Hedo come in just 5 days for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Too bad I'll be having too much fun looking at naked bodies, drinking, relaxing and fucking to find time to read my book (on how to be "King" of course) under the palm trees!

[JAnewbies]

S babee... wazzzzuuuupppppp!!!! You are going in FIVE DAYS.... YOU SUCK!!! but that's the whole idea, right (lol)...

I wish you guys the best trip ever. Have tons of fun and do a toast for me while you are there.

Lots of love from "J"...

[55chevy]

The King is pissed off. Damn I hate when that happens to royalty.

[JAnewbies]

His intolerant self was just on here to make himself feel important.

[jimandkristy]

Hey Solstyce! We have not seen much of you (or maybe we just looking in the right places) but have a great time and get things ready for us in May.

[Just Doc]

I just want to know who voted that guy to be king????
Cussing at someone to prove your point never proves anything past your lack of vocabulary.

xox
Emmy