Why be ashamed??

[rast67]

The "life style"…

I wonder where this type of "life style" will be in 20 years.

There are so many parallels between the gay community in the 60’s,70’s, and 80’s and the "life style" of today.

1. It is considered a taboo
2. We keep it a secret (in the closet)
3. We don’t tell our friends and family (or very limited few)
4. We don’t tell our employer
5. We travel to far off places to be ourselves (or have secret house parties)
6. It is socially not an acceptable practice
7. Some people consider us sick (something must be wrong with you) or morally corrupt
8. The church frowns upon it
9. We have secret ways of letting others know we are in the life style
10. We get stereo typed (everybody fucking everybody without consideration)
11. Being complimented for not fitting into stereotyped roles (eg "I never would have thought you were in the life style, you seem so normal"!)


I could have written the same list about the gay community 20-30 years ago, and ALL points would have had equal value.
At one point, we must have the courage to say this is the new normal. We should stand up and not accept the criticism which puts us into a box.

Just my 2 cents…

The chemist and the flyer
Next HEDO visit 29 Dec. 2016 – 8 Jan. 2017

[mac_r_a]

Love it!!!!

[moonbeachcpl]

Do you think most people in the LGBT community would support people in the "life style?"

[happy2us]

There were plenty of lifestyle people around in the 60's & 70's. Key parties? Playboy Clubs? It's as old as Father Time if, ya know, he had a really cute wife and messed around with the couple across the street, Mother Nature and her boy toy Smokey The Bear.

[J&JSwinginPA]

Do you think most people in the LGBT community would support people in the "life style?"

I don't see why not, the two aren't necessarily mutually exclusive

[Ontario]

The "life style"…

I wonder where this type of "life style" will be in 20 years.

There are so many parallels between the gay community in the 60’s,70’s, and 80’s and the "life style" of today.

1. It is considered a taboo
2. We keep it a secret (in the closet)
3. We don’t tell our friends and family (or very limited few)
4. We don’t tell our employer
5. We travel to far off places to be ourselves (or have secret house parties)
6. It is socially not an acceptable practice
7. Some people consider us sick (something must be wrong with you) or morally corrupt
8. The church frowns upon it
9. We have secret ways of letting others know we are in the life style
10. We get stereo typed (everybody fucking everybody without consideration)
11. Being complimented for not fitting into stereotyped roles (eg "I never would have thought you were in the life style, you seem so normal"!)


I could have written the same list about the gay community 20-30 years ago, and ALL points would have had equal value.
At one point, we must have the courage to say this is the new normal. We should stand up and not accept the criticism which puts us into a box.

Just my 2 cents…

The chemist and the flyer
Next HEDO visit 29 Dec. 2016 – 8 Jan. 2017

Well put....

[CopNkitten]

Im lucky that I don't have to keep it secret.
I won't get fired from my job.
Had a rough childhood, raised by grandparents who are gone.
Everyone else I don't really care what they think, so we don't brag about our lifestyle but we don't hide it either.
Cop..

[Rondog]

(Moonbeach)Yes, as they are in the same boat. Frowned on by most, if not all churches and religions. It's sad that this day and age people can't just let people be what they want to be. But for some reason they feel they must "save" us from our self. PLUR

[ShyinOntario]

Im lucky that I don't have to keep it secret.
I won't get fired from my job.
Had a rough childhood, raised by grandparents who are gone.
Everyone else I don't really care what they think, so we don't brag about our lifestyle but we don't hide it either.
Cop..

It must be something about law enforcement... I know a couple cops in my town and there is a higher proportion of them who are in the lifestyle (from what I've been told).

It might be like you said that they don't necessarily need to hide it for work.

[rast67]

Im lucky that I don't have to keep it secret.
I won't get fired from my job.
Had a rough childhood, raised by grandparents who are gone.
Everyone else I don't really care what they think, so we don't brag about our lifestyle but we don't hide it either.
Cop..

Again...

I think you are the exception to the rule. Just like in the 60's, 70's, and 80's there were exceptions to the rule.
The thought behind the thread is not to prove a point, but to point out similarities, with the hopes it will change in the future.
If the past is any proof at all, then one day our way of life should be accepted.

As discussed multiple times on this forum, there is a huge misunderstanding of what couples do and are in the lifestyle.
I believe the hardest part for people on the outside looking in, is the fact that we love our significant other more rather than less.

Anyway, very happy and a bit jealous you can flaunt and live the lifestyle in an open matter.

Cheers
The chemist and the flyer

[HughJudy]

Years ago I wrote an tongue and cheek article for a lifestyle magazine, saying we should have turned this into a religion. Points being, we already gather for a religious experience (I've heard the word god used many times during the night), we have donations that go to our local clubs, and going to Hedo would be a religious retreat. That saying if we were a religion, we would have federal laws that protect us, all donations to the clubs would be tax deductible, as well as the trips to Hedonism. My thought was if a science fiction writer could make a religion, why couldn't someone in the lifestyle. Blasphemous? Maybe so, but really interesting to look into. All the pieces are already there. For most religions all that is there is a group of people practicing their beliefs. Is that not what we are doing now? H & J

[jshell]

Here's another angle to consider.

We get to feel like members of a private, secret club. Take away the taboo and the sneaky teenager vibe and some of the allure goes away.

I think widespread acceptance would dilute some of the draw and appeal.

Plus, I like a private element of my life.

[rast67]

Here's another angle to consider.

We get to feel like members of a private, secret club. Take away the taboo and the sneaky teenager vibe and some of the allure goes away.

I think widespread acceptance would dilute some of the draw and appeal.

Plus, I like a private element of my life.

Never really thought of it that way. Yes having a "secret" is kind of cool and naughty.
The secret should, in my humble opinion, not come with a stigma of being morally corrupt.

Here in Europe they say up to 10% - 15% of couples are somehow involved in a lifestyle relationship.
That would be more than the official gay community. If that is the case, I believe at one point the lifestyle will become more accepted.

Which means... we might have to find another secret ...

Cheers,
The Chemist and the Flyer

[sunandsea]

Here's another angle to consider.

We get to feel like members of a private, secret club. Take away the taboo and the sneaky teenager vibe and some of the allure goes away.

I think widespread acceptance would dilute some of the draw and appeal.

Plus, I like a private element of my life.

Totally agree.....

[foxxyandhound]

As Cop said. we don't brag about it but we don't hide it either... we got outted 20 years ago about being in the lifestyle so most around here know and we are old news now. LOL