This is our 7th trip to Hedo in the past 6 years, however, this one started off very different for us, as until now we always go to Hedo the third week of January. This was to be our second trip to Hedo in one year, which has never happened before.
Background scenario and how the conversation went…
We had only returned from our January trip a few weeks previous and there was a snow storm, I had a cold and felt like shit and the driveway was full of snow as I looked out the window…and we still had a few more months of winter left to go!
Her: What's the matter with you? (I must have looked really bad)
Me: This is crap, I want to go back to Hedo.
Her: We just got home and we can't afford it.
Me: Yeah, we can.
Her: We need new living room furniture, this stuff is getting really worn.
Me: Ok, we can scout around and see what we can get, Leon's and The Brick have a sale on. (Note: furniture was purchased before we left for Hedo).
Her: We also need the driveway repaved.
Me: I'll call and get some estimates is May.
Her: The siding on the house needs painting.
Me: What colour would you like?
Her: The umbrella on the deck needs replacing, I'd rather have a permanent gazebo.
Me: Canadian Tire has a pre-season sale on, let's go over and see what we can get. (Note: purchased that day and stored)
Her: The front walkway needs patching and repainting.
Me: I have the paint and I will get some patch concrete.
Her: The Maple Tree will need pruning.
Me: No problem, I have the tree trimmer and extention.
Her: I still don't know
Me: This is where I pulled a last minute act of desperation with my "Ace in the hole"…"This April is our 45th Wedding Anniversary, wouldn't it be nice to do something really special for that" (I was dripping like Maple Syrup lol).
Her: I just don't want to go and stand in the pool all day and drink.
Me: No problem (knowing that my position was still precarious), I know a group from the Adult Travel Forum who do a lot of things…thanks Cop, your trip reports really paid off for me! As my final act of sealing the deal I showed her Kitten and Angel's web site.
Her: OK, if you think we can afford it. (At this point I knew that on our return home my job list would be extensive and labourious.)
Me: Do you realize that this borders on extortion and possibly prostitution?
Her: I'm not unduly concerned.
I had no time to lose…the next day I managed to have a telephone conversation with Fred of Kitten and Angel who assured me that all would be well and then contacted WestJet for our flight…the same one we always use 2702 at 10:15 a.m. from Pearson Airport in Toronto. She couldn't back out now!
About 3 days before departure my excitement always goes flat and I start thinking about the airport and flight hassle and what can go wrong…hope we don't get bumped from the resort, etc.
The day of departure, up at 5 a.m., leave at 6, stop at Timmies for coffee and breakfast sandwich to go and head for the airport, park the truck in the Viscount parking lot and get the monorail to Terminal 3 at Pearson. At this point I relax more as things are now out of my control and despite the best efforts of the Security procedures to dampen my enthusiasm, they failed miserably. Flight left right on time and we arrived in Montego Bay about 10 minutes early.
Customs and Immigration at Montego Bay Airport is always easy and very efficient, especially on Sunday, and our bags were waiting for us at the baggage carousel when we exited Customs. Managed to find our bus kiosk, grabbed a beer at Jimmy Buffet's and were escorted to a large bus. Damn, there were about 18 people on the bus so we would likely be making a lot of stops (as it turned out we were the only ones going to Hedo). On the way our bus driver gave a running commentary on Jamaican history, places of interest, Jamaican politics, etc. a very interesting guy, which made the trip go faster, we did stop at Grand Palladium, the Golden Apple Bar (which I suspect was owned by a relative of the driver lol) for a pee and a beer and then Riu before we arrived at Hedo…fortunately no one condemned us with fire and brimstone and eternal damnation to hell as we departed the bus. Total trip from landing to arriving at the resort was about 2 and a half hours, which was pretty good considering the amount of stops we made.
This trip we booked Garden View Prude (to save some money for the materials needed to complete my job list when we got home). We were assigned room 1136 ground floor as per our request, which is in the building about halfway down the path before the Ocean View Prude rooms. This was good as Herladyship had knee surgery about 5 weeks before we left and we wanted to keep walking and climbing stairs to a minimum. Once our bags arrived we headed to the nude pool to wash off the travel stink and replenish our drinks. While at the nude pool bar the first person we met from this board was Soo of SooIan and I got my first "Hedo Hug". Our first mission was to find Fred of K&A and after asking around the pool we were told he was probably at the beach. Later that evening before we went to dinner we thought we would check the K&A desk at the lobby, no one was there but we were approached by Brian of Brian&Terri who recognized us from our profile pic (we also have a mutual friend). He knew where Fred was sitting and introduced us. The K&A beach party was the next day on the prude beach and he would meet us there with our swag back and we could give him the school supplies we had brought.
Sunday was Schoolgirl night and one of my favourite themes (I love repressed Catholic girls…I married one!). Herladyship dressed in her schoolgirl gear but unfortunately our lights were starting to go out as we had inhaled our usual amount of first-day alcohol and we had been up since 5 a.m. However, we had the whole week to look forward to!
Our first full day…
Arose sometime in the morning and went to breakfast (I love the choices at the Buffet for breakfast) and then went to see if we could find some loungers of which there were plenty. After claiming our "spot" under a big tree by the nude pool it was time to head for the K&A Beach Party. It was at the far end of the prude beach near the Sandals Library. We met Fred, Angel and of course Cop and Kitten, the group leaders. We exchanged our school supply bag for our Kitten and Angel swag bag. When Herladyship looked in the swag bag she couldn't believe it…it was an Aladdin's cave of things, mugs, sunglasses, pens, notebook, lanyards, rubber bracelets, etc., etc. Cop even had a label machine so he could put our names on our mugs after which we went to the bar they had set up to check the mugs for leaks…yes, they even had a bar set up on the beach…! They also had a food station and grill set up lest we become weak from hunger during the festivities. To us the best part was just standing in the ocean by a raft and having drinks with our new friends, all of whom we had only known on line on the travel forum. I am getting the impression this group does things up right!
They had games on the beach like horseshoes and Nudie Man made his appearance. While moving beach loungers we were approached by "simhow" who introduced themselves. I was under great pressure because this couple had emailed me from another board we are both on. We were all veterans of Club Orient in St. Martin and they wanted to know my view of the differences between Club O and Hedo, which I gave to them and they decided to go to Hedo. We hung out with them occasionally during the week and they seemed to be having a blast burning the midnight oil. I hate recommending something to someone and it doesn't work out, but I think in this case I may be off the hook! LOL
After the beach party we attended the K&A Cocktail Party in the Piano Bar. It was another fun social event, they even took pictures of all the couples there…assuring us that none would end up on the internet! We had our photos taken…one serious and one silly, which is what we do with our grandchildren. Little did we know they were going to print out both copies for us. The resort theme for that night was Jamaican Colours which we did dress for and then had dinner with Naughty Nudists and as usual enjoyed the show. We then went to the K&A costume contest on the pool deck whose theme was Pimps and Hos…wait a minute, there are a lot of really great costumes and a lot of people participating in this, another eye opener about this group! Later in the evening …about 12:30 a.m. and after drinking all day, I thought it would be a great idea to go to the nude pool for pizza, which was really good at the time. As it turned out, it was not such a great idea when I awoke at 3:30 a.m. with indigestion.
Tuesday - A Three Hour Tour?
The day started off with breakfast, however, I passed on food as I still had indigestion from the night before! The usual trek to our loungers, pool time, lunch at the Nude Pool, pool time and then time to head for the cruise. This story has a bit of a background as we had gone on a catamaran cruise to the cliffs a couple of years ago and Herladyship was "not amused". The boat was overcrowded by about 30 people, no room to move, the food was gone in minutes and they played this incidious rap music that no self-respecting 16 year old would listen to and worst of all someone was doing pussy shots on the bar and you couldn't get a drink!
Herladyship took some convincing (with a little help from Fred) and I told her this one would be different . Being a K&A sponsored cruise our leaders showed up as the cast of the S.S. Minnow with Fred as the Skipper, Cop as Gilligan, Kitten as Mary Ann and Angel was dolled up as Ginger, so much so that Winston seemed envious! The S.S. Minnow turned out to be the large catamaran "Tortuga". There we around 40 signed up for the cruise and there was plenty of room to move around. The Skipper and Gilligan put on occasional short skits as we sailed. Our first stop a few of miles along the coast was for snorkelling. We had about 25 minutes to explore, however, after less than 25 minutes the whistle went for us to return to the boat…oh well, I needed a beer to wash the salt from my lips anyway. When I got back on board I was told that the snorkelling had to be cut short as some people had been stung by jellyfish, I then realized that I also had been stung on the hand and arm…they must be little bastards because I didn't even see them! It really wasn't much pain at all (as I hadn't even noticed at first). Seems the local cure is to rub rum on the sting area, good idea but I'll take mine internally please!
We weighed anchor and sailed to a beach where we (a) had to get dressed due to others being there and (b) wade ashore. On the beach there were tables with table cloths on and chairs. There was a bar and barbecue set up where we had snacks and drinks to take to our tables where we sat with Brian&Terri. There were a few other buildings there such as a bathroom (so to speak) and a bar area where it looked like some serious partying goes on. We then packed up and and headed back to Hedo. Along the way we were treated to the most glorious sunset as the Skipper asked us all to raise a glass. The S.S. Minnow survived the three hour cruise…despite the fact that Gilligan neglected to put fuel in the tank! Herladyship thoroughly enjoyed herself…the K&A crew saved my ass once more!
That night was bare as you dare glow party and once again the K&A costume contest was over the top with plenty of contestants. We don't always dress for the themes but loved watching and wondering how the judges ever selected the winners when costumes were so creative!
Wednesday - Fetish
Again up sometime in the morning, breakfast, which I was able to handle today, lounger, socialize in the pool, lunch at the nude pool ( love their fish), more pool time and drinks and then off to K&A's croquet tournament. This was held behind the Piano Bar where the mini putt used to be. When we arrived we were shocked to see two croquet pitches set up with six mallets and 6 balls on each, the adjudicator's tent and of course the inevitable bar staffed by two of the female ECs dress in white (skimpy) and Fred resplendant in his "whites". Uncle Dan (?) was also dressed in his finery and acted as official adjudicator for any disputes that may arise. We were asked to form teams of two and not necessarily with our own spouse so we did a "swap" with Brian and Terri. Herladyship played with Brian and Terri and I partnered up. As it turned out, not many had played croquet and even more had never heard of it! It had been more years than I care to remember for me! After a briefing we began play on the two pitches. Although this is a very sedate game (anything you can do while drinking beer is not a sport, lol) I detected some frustration in a few players so I demonstrated the "pool shot" with the shaft of the mallet. This technique is not really "cricket" but the adjudicator allowed it! After about an hour and a half the winners on our pitch came in, Toddy and Brian were second and Terri and I finished third in a field of 6…a respectable finish. The spectators were attentive throughout the tournament and gave mild rounds of applause for a good shot, although one of them did fall asleep (I think alcohol may have been involved). The winners on each pitch played off for the championship in an abbreviated game. It was a really fun, social afternoon and once again demonstrated the creativity of the group leaders!
Today was also the Repeaters Party on the main pool deck. We always enjoy this with the variety and quality of food they serve…I love seafood and actually ate eel for the first time! Herladyship stuck with the more land based fare.
Tonight was Fetish Night (again one of my favourites). Herladyship bought a sexy dress on-line and I actually got away with buying her a studded dog collar with matching bracelet …which she wore on her ankle because it was too big for her wrist! Later that night we attended the K&A costume contest on the pool deck.Once again the costumes and participation was over the top!
Thursday - Toga, Circus and Foam Party!
This was to end up being a very special day for us. We did our usual breakfast, (gym for me, water aerobes for her), beach, lunch, pool until it was time to get dressed for Toga Night! The K&A theme was "Over the Big Top" A Grand Circus Celebration". To say this was over the top is an understatement. When we arrived the pool deck was decorated like a circus complete with candy floss, popcorn and even a clown on stilts. Fred of course was the Ringmaster and Cop and Kitten dressed in very elaborate clown costumes. Cop also did some juggling, but if I may be permitted to say, there may have been a time or two that he had some trouble keeping his balls in order! lol. After the dinner and show was over the costume contest began for the circus theme, we had worn our togas along with a couple of other people. The costumes in the contest were some of the most elaborate and creative that I have ever seen. Prizes were awarded but I don't know how the hell the judges ever made a decision. Following the competition Fred said that he had a special surprise and everyone was asked to assemble at the beach on the dock. It was there that each couple was presented with a wish lantern and we were to think of those that had passed, the sick, the unfortunate, etc. For us this was a very poignant moment. The previous year we had three friends pass away and also Herladyship's brother is in palliative care for cancer and likely will not make it past the summer. As the lanterns went up there were a few damp eyes.
After the lanterns we went up to check out the foam party. Surprisingly it was on the patio outside the boutique. Initially they had trouble getting the inflatable pool to fill with foam as the wind was not cooperating and much of the foam did not make it into the pool. We gave it a try anyway but it was just not the same as in the disco…not as many naked bodies slithering around! People were dancing outside the pool and having a great time as there was more room to move as opposed to the disco. They even had a guy with a hose to spray you down after to get the foam off. The pool did fill with foam eventually, but again, not many people in there. My understanding is that they were working on the floor in the disco.
Friday
We did our usual breakfast, beach, lunch, pool until it was time to head for the K&A naked volleyball game at the main pool. A lot of fun with Fred as the referee (such as it was lol) with strict enforcement of the rules…Hedo style. The team Herladyship and I was on were soundly defeated the first two games, infact in the second game we failed to score a point. For the third game we had a slight change of personnel and our team finally won a game! Before the third game I suggested to the referee that perhaps the losing team should get a blow job/muff dive…I think this may have been what turned the tide for us! However, no prizes were awarded! After the game we dispersed around the pool and socialized. Sadly, this morning we had to say farewell to Brian&Terri who we had spent some very enjoyable time with this week.
Tonight was also Rock Star night, we don't do rock star night but we really enjoy the music. The ECs are always great but tonight we were treated to a guitar riff by the rasta guy (sorry don't know his name) in the band. This guy can really rock it! We would really like to hear more from the band itself as they are usually backing someone else up. Back to the main bar and we had our farewell toast with K&A. Later in the even they had a girl singer and DJ entertaining on the patio outside the boutique, great idea!
Saturday
Again we did our usual breakfast, beach, lunch, pool with one exception. We went to the lobby to say farewell to "Naughty Nudists" who we had also spent some very enjoyable time with. Unfortunately they were both under the weather for the last couple of days with the "Hedo Kennel Cough". In the pool that afternoon I was walking along the side when a couple at a table in the pool called out to me. I didn't know who it was at first but it turned out to be a couple we know from the Ponderosa Resort (a.k.a. "the Pond") where we go during the summer at home. They also said there was another couple there from "the Pond" who we met the next day…small world!
Tonight was Hats and Heels and Herladyship actually got up on stage for the competition…mainly because I ratted her out to EC Diana who got her up on stage. She didn't win but definitely looked hot and certainly did not look like a grandmother of 7! Went into the piano bar and hung out for a while, we are not Karaoke fans but did not hear anything that was ear shattering painful. It is loud in there but I believe it is more a matter of acoustics than volume.
Sunday
Sadly this was our departure day: breakfast, pack, short beach time, lunch, pool and then back to the room to collect our stuff and check out. They did let us have our room for an extra hour as our pickup was not until 2:25. Said farewell to as many people as we could find, got on the bus and well…you know the rest of the story! As our plane was about to leave the jetway to depart there was a complete power failure in the airport so our departure was delayed about 15 minutes, but still arrived in Toronto on time.
Kitten and Angel's Spring Fling...
The group leaders plan each event in exquisite detail and their enthusiasm is nothing short of monumental. The group costumes are always over the top and there is very high attendance at each event they hold …you guys saved my ass big time! Herladyship is now talking about next year and researching costumes, this has never happened before!
The Weather
The first thing we noticed being different from January was there was more humidity and it was slightly hotter. We did get one torrential rain storm Thursday afternoon which cleared the pool of revellers and we headed to our room until it stopped about an hour later. That was about the only blip weather wise.
The ECs and staff
The ECs and staff are always very friendly but we thought it was even more so this trip. We were asked multiple times by all staff if we were having a good time…even the maintenance crew. One afternoon in our chairs EC Nicolas came over and spent about a half hour visiting with us and answering Herladyship's questions about the process to become an EC… it is a very involved process!
The only very minor blip we had with our room was a leaky toilet, which the maid noticed and called maintenance who fixed it very quickly. Everything else worked just fine.
Improvements
Because we had been to Hedo only about 4 months previous we did not notice a lot of changes, except for the black rubber mats on the steps and along the side of the nude pool. This is of course a great safety feature as many people have slipped, however, those mats are black and get very HOT in the sun! When there is an event taking place poolside the mats have to be covered with wet towels.
Those we met…
We did miss our January friends but I had made a list on my iPad from the ATF forum of who would be there at the same time as us in April. Unfortunately I think I fat fingered it (alcohol may have been involved here too) and deleted part of the list. It is always said that it is the people who make Hedo what it is and we thoroughly believe that. FredandPatti and CopNKitten were unsurpassable hosts. NaughtyNudists, DickSinglecruiser, BrianandTerri, simhow, SooIan, lisa+sean, Canada_fun, Ontario, marcandcleo69 and all the others we met..it was great meeting and hanging out with "all y"all".
Now…on with the job list!
Respectfullly submittted,
CapnMorgan and Herladyship
(a.k.a John and Toddy)
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Co-Hosts of kitten + angel's 15th Annual Spring Fling April 9th - 16th, 2022 (We will be onsite 4/7/22 - 4/18/22) 
Originally Posted by CopNkitten
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We were very happy to meet so many friendly people. We were concerned that we wouldn't fit... but that feeling left on day one.
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