Rules about threesomes

**Samson2010** · 10-07-2015, 08:53 PM

We are excited to go to hedo very soon but do a question about the "rules" when it comes to threesomes. We would like to have a woman join us but we are not really interested in the husband to join or even watch.

Is it normal practice that a woman would go and join a threesome and the husband goes off to occupy himself?

Can anyone suggest a way to approach this?

We are just trying to figure out how to approach this but we find it weird just asking a couple for the husband to go away.

**CopNkitten** · 10-07-2015, 10:24 PM

It happens but it's a delicate subject, to tell a couple he we want the woman but not the man.
definitely be honest up front what your looking for.
Perhaps putting your dates on here when you will be onsite will be a start.
Or a single girl that is there looking to have fun with a couple.
Cop..

**ruup4us** · 10-07-2015, 10:31 PM

Are you willing to share your wife with another couple so they can fulfill their fantasy of a threesome also? If your answer is no, then don't expect favorable results.

**bumpngrind** · 10-07-2015, 11:09 PM

I would agree with ruup4us. Being in the lifestyle for 8+ years, I can say that we've witnessed very few situations where couples separate so that the female half participates in a threesome while the husband goes and entertains himself. It's not entirely unheard of but it is rare because most couples get into the lifestyle to experience it together. While there are couples who play separate room, it's rare that they proceed without their partner involved in some capacity. You will want to seek out couples that consider themselves in open relationships, rather than swinging relationships, which happens much less frequently at Hedo. You may be more likely to succeed in seeking out a single female to play with; although to be honest there are only a dozen or so at Hedo at most times we've been there; and with 200 couples that's a lot of "competition" for their attention. As CopNKitten says, it does happen but is a delicate subject and you need to be up front on your expectations so that the couple doesn't perceive you to being deceptive; you wouldn't want to waste their/your time on an opportunity that may not have any chance of happening. Top three recommendations - set expectations, be polite and respectful and communicate. Best of luck

**Samson2010** · 10-08-2015, 06:59 AM

Thank you. We apreciate the information.

**bigdawg** · 10-08-2015, 07:03 AM

Not even letting the husband watch sounds kind of harsh. As stated above that's a tough sell. A single lady will fit in nicely but there are not that many of them.

I wonder why you don't want the other husband to participate or even watch?

To answer your question: Once you've established that a couple are in the lifestyle I guess an approach might be to ask them if they like to play separately.

**HedoJoe** · 10-08-2015, 07:26 AM

It would be pretty insulting to the husband!

**jshell** · 10-08-2015, 07:49 AM

As a general rule, it will be awkward to ask for a favor you wouldn't return.

**SamAndRose** · 10-08-2015, 08:24 AM

If you are looking for only a single female and not a male, have you considered hiring a local professional? This doesn't solve your 'What do we do at Hedo?" question but it may be a solution for when you are at home.

**doubledown** · 10-08-2015, 08:42 AM

2X3 = 3X2 You just need two other couples instead of one single female. That looks like much more fun.

**Cdn_cpl** · 10-08-2015, 10:17 AM

Originally Posted by bigdawg

To answer your question: Once you've established that a couple are in the lifestyle I guess an approach might be to ask them if they like to play separately.

But even then it doesn't mean she'll play with a couple. Many swingers play separately but only with one person. I have no problem with my wife playing with another man or woman by herself but I'd be offended it she was asked to play with another couple without me being involved.

**J&JSwinginPA** · 10-08-2015, 10:36 AM

I can't speak for all couples however, we play separately quite a bit but we would have no interest in the type of arrangement you're looking for, that's a tough sell.

**daphnelson** · 10-08-2015, 10:44 AM

Good luck with the "rules of threesomes" and your hope of MFF / FMF threesome at Hedo. Our 2 cents......go and enjoy yourself and what happens happens. Have a great time.

**daphnelson** · 10-08-2015, 10:45 AM

Originally Posted by j&jswinginpa

i can't speak for all couples however, we play separately quite a bit but we would have no interest in the type of arrangement you're looking for, that's a tough sell.

yep

**Evo99** · 10-08-2015, 11:20 AM

I've had the experience of being asked to play with another couple without my partner present a couple of times (not at Hedo, just within the lifestyle). I was a bit offended that they wanted me to play and not my partner. Then I came to the conclusion that these people weren't really into swinging as much as satisfying the old stereotype fantasy of FMF/FFM.
That being said...tread lightly with this subject.