swingers

**ky-hedo** · 07-28-2014, 07:27 PM

We were thinking of going during a swingers week. We have never "played" before but have talked about it. Any suggestions as if this would be a good time to try it or should we before hand? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

**details024** · 07-28-2014, 07:40 PM

There are a bunch of different swingers groups. A first time experience is probably better done at home. There are a lot of emotions linked with the first experience that may make a difficult vacation.

Of course that was only our opinion

**cands** · 07-28-2014, 09:39 PM

Going during a lifestyle sponsored week/event would improve your odds over a regular week. Unless you tend to be impetuous while on vacation there's no reason to rule out playing while at Hedo.

In general the following advice applies:

Discuss the topic fully.
Set boundaries before you take the plunge.
Discuss again.
Communicate your expectations and limits with potential play partners.
Proceed at a pace where both partners are comfortable. (Usually the ladies set the pace)
Discuss further

**sexylady** · 07-28-2014, 10:59 PM

Anytime is a good time, but times when the resort is full is better. January is said to be Swingers month. There is Lovevoodoo week in March and November. Lot's of Lovevoodoo members attend, we are not, but we still go during both their week sand find many swingers. I am sure you don't need first time advice. Everyone takes and makes it at their own pace and own way. Some like to do it separate rooms, some like a 4some in the same room. Don't rush it. An ideal place to start is in the hot tub with lots of heavy petting close to each other, so that if there are any signs of jealousy on the other side one is prepared to stop. Be prepare to ask each other frequently, if it is going fine and before taking the final plunge. Talk a lot about the experience after the event, so that you can go on or drop off from the next. It may take longer, patience, consideration, understanding and volution are very important. Good luck. It took us 5 visits to really get going - step by step.

**HedoJoe** · 07-29-2014, 07:09 AM

Originally Posted by cands

In general the following advice applies:

Discuss the topic fully.
Set boundaries before you take the plunge.
Discuss again.
Communicate your expectations and limits with potential play partners.
Proceed at a pace where both partners are comfortable. (Usually the ladies set the pace)
Discuss further

I totally agree with all of this. Communication is key. Spend some time discussing what you THINK may happen or what you would like to happen and see how each of you would react. Stick to your boundaries or rules. Never go beyond or change a rule in the heat of the moment. Discuss it the following day. The last thing you want is a big blow up amongst the two of you while you are on vacation.

**JayNSteph** · 07-29-2014, 07:26 AM

You don't have to go during a "swingers" week. There are plenty of people who play that don't necessarily go during a swingers week. Our first time we didn't go during a swingers week and jumped into things with no problems, there were plenty of people that were able to "help" us move into the LS. We were ready and discussed it all in length before we went, as stated above. We had a great time and now go every year with the same group. Our group consists of swingers, nudists only and even some that don't even leave the prude side. So no matter what time you go to Hedo, you will be able to experience what you want to.

**mac_r_a** · 07-29-2014, 08:51 AM

Every week can be a swingers week at Hedo

I know January is lifestyle month, but besides for that I think the rest of the year is a good mixture of swingers and nudists and so on. Just pick a time you can go and look at the groups that are there and contact them to see what they offer.

Sassy* · 07-29-2014, 11:11 AM

Talk, talk and talk some more! Communication is key. As already mentioned, talk openly about rules, boundaries, fantasies and feelings.

Remember if a hook up happens at Hedo and doesn't go well, you can't vote them off the Island

Could b awkward.

**funlover** · 07-29-2014, 12:54 PM

also, go without any expectations. you can talk about everything, but dont go so much looking for it, because then it seems like it can be consuming. just my opinion.

**W&K** · 07-29-2014, 01:00 PM

Originally Posted by mac_r_a

Every week can be a swingers week at Hedo

I know January is lifestyle month, but besides for that I think the rest of the year is a good mixture of swingers and nudists and so on. Just pick a time you can go and look at the groups that are there and contact them to see what they offer.

For sure... Any week of the year has a good mix from all lifestyles... Swingers, naturists, prudes (definite minority), naughty naturists, etc.

**ky-hedo** · 07-29-2014, 02:58 PM

All the advice is very much appreciated. Thanks

**details024** · 07-29-2014, 04:19 PM

Originally Posted by funlover

also, go without any expectations. you can talk about everything, but dont go so much looking for it, because then it seems like it can be consuming. just my opinion.

I agree. My hubby and I enjoyed playing with each other when we weren't playing with others. But like I said, I recommend trying out the lifestyle at home first. Your first experience can be overwhelming and if you have a bad experience you are stuck there with the couple that you had it with.

**flfitguy** · 07-29-2014, 07:26 PM

Originally Posted by details024

There are a bunch of different swingers groups. A first time experience is probably better done at home. There are a lot of emotions linked with the first experience that may make a difficult vacation. During our trip to hedo we attempted to play with a new couple and I swore that I would never do that again on vacation.

Of course that was only our opinion

GREAT ADVICE!!! I concur, I would not make hedonism your first experience.

**mac_r_a** · 07-29-2014, 07:31 PM

I disagree with trying at home if you are not comfortable with that. I know I wasn't comfortable going to a swing club at home in case I ran into someone or I also had a fear (silly, I know) that he would fall in love with someone he meant since they would be local. We had our first experience at Hedo and the best advise I can give is to talk about EVERYTHING and have something you can do that no one else will notice if one of you feel uncomfortable - which would mean to leave immediately. Our is a gentle pinch to the shoulder - we have never had to use it but it is great to know we have it.

**JayNSteph** · 07-29-2014, 07:38 PM

I don't think it matters when/where you choose your first experience to be because you will have the same emotions of some sort attached to it. As long as you have spoken about everything before AND after, you should be fine. It is up to you how you may feel about it. We didn't have our first experience at Hedo, but we made sure we talked about everything in length before we even did a soft swap which eventually led to full swap. It is all about when YOU are ready, before, during or after Hedo, it doesn't really matter. Communication is the main key, as everyone has stated.