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Thread: Hedo or desire?

  1. #1
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    Hedo or desire?

    I was just told by the queen that she wants to go to desire or hedo next may in 2015 so we can start paying for it now and have it paid for before we go. Now my question is this what ones are better and why? We have never been to a resort so it's all new to us. We do go to a couple of swing clubs and hotel take overs. I have read for food and a better place desire is better. I can't judge about any of them because I haven't been. I don't nessarly need a swing place we just want a place to have fun together and get away.
    Thanks for any info

  2. #2
    Registered User SamAndRose's Avatar
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    Careful with that question - this is like going to Comicon and asking which Superhero is best...

    They both have their positives and negatives, and you will find people on this board who will give you their opinion. This board is mostly pro-Hedo, but you will find more and more people posting about the Desires on here.

    Take some time to poke around the board - read the trip reports, ask more specific questions (which has a better beach?) and you will find out what's best for you.

    FWIW, we've been to both Desire Pearl and Hedo 2. Until the renovations are completed at Hedo, I don't think we would go back there. But I do know that Hedo's beach is way better than Desire (as all beaches in Mexico are public and anyone can walk past you down the beach, even kids.)

    Good luck with your research.
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  3. #3
    Registered User The Timidtwo's Avatar
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    We've done a LOT of review-reading, on this site, Travel-advisor, and a few others. Near as we can tell, it's like comparing grapes or strawberries: both are tasty fruits, but it depends in what texture, sweetness, tartness, etc, that you prefer.

    What kind of experience are you looking for? Spring-break-like partying, or laid back and slower paced? Do you like a larger resort, or a smaller? Looking to swing, socialize, scuba dive...? It seems to us - with only research and no experience behind us - that both resorts have their die-hard fans, and both have their charms. There are a fair amount of people who go to both. The people at EITHER resort who post very bad reviews seem to be people who got out of it what they were willing to put in to it: nothing.

    Our solution is to pick one and then try the other next time...

  4. #4
    Registered User mac_r_a's Avatar
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    We have been to Hedo 2 and Hedo 3 (now closed) and Desire RM. We prefer Hedo as it is much more social and open. Desire may have nicer rooms and their food is a bit better (only a bit) but they lack fun (my opinion). The Hedo atmosphere is what makes it Hedo, many have tried to replicate and as of now have not been able to do it. If you have any questions, pm me. I have posted several trip reports for Hedo and one for Desire.
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  5. #5
    Registered User gsml's Avatar
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    Still in transit on the way back from Hedo. We already booked for next year before we left.

    We have been to both Desire RM and Pearl. Both are nicer and have great food, but the food at Hedo has improved enormously in the last year, to the point that I would no longer use that as a deciding factor. Hedo still lacks a couples playroom and the hottub at Pearl is simply the best in my book. One thing is for sure, if going to either Desire, go with a group or you may be boared.

  6. #6
    Registered User The Timidtwo's Avatar
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    Well that just cinched Hedo for us...we are members of no groups!

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    Thank you for the replys they all bring up very good points. I'm not really sure what to ask just yet as I'm not really sure what to expect. Right now I don't really want the heavy party but by next year who knows. I'm not one for the ocean since the last time I got in the ocean I got a really bad virus in my eyes and had to go to a couple of specialist to get ride of it. We are looking for fun but want to relax and explore we're ever we go. I do agree I would want to find a group and go with for the entertainment and probably cheaper. I will continue to research and thank you again

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    Quote Originally Posted by SamAndRose View Post
    But I do know that Hedo's beach is way better than Desire (as all beaches in Mexico are public and anyone can walk past you down the beach, even kids.)
    While I would agree that the beach at Hedo is marginally better than Desire (although about the worst on 7 Mile Beach), the specific reason you gave was invalid. Why? Because all beaches in JAMAICA are also public and anyone can walk past you down the beach, even kids, there too.

  9. #9
    Registered User 46to10's Avatar
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    We've been to Hedo II and III 5 times and have had some great times but we've heard and read so many good things about Desire we decided to give it a try this fall on a 5 day trip with the SDC Halloween takeover. Completely agree that Hedo is a very fun and social place. Great people, especially if you join the right group. Beach at Hedo is nice, pool area is a bit small, tough to get a lounge chair. Food is generally good and you can't argue with the variety of food options they offer over the course of a week. Nice exercise room and some basic water sports. The occasional creepy single guy.

    Desire is couples only, looks to be a bit more couples-oriented as opposed to party oriented. Desire looks to have a few more formal rules. Dress code for the guys at dinner, no PDAs by the pool or beach but they do allow PDAs by the hot tub area and they have a playroom. Theme nights at Hedo tend to get a lot of participation. Desire offers a foam party which can be a blast if done right. Can't speak from experience but have heard very good things about the food and service at Desire.

  10. #10
    Registered User noodbrood's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Timidtwo View Post
    Well that just cinched Hedo for us...we are members of no groups!
    Groups are very easy to find. There aren't membership fees or anything like that. Most times, you do get group rates if you book with the group. With ours, for example, we do have discounted rates. We also have an online group to enable people to get to know each other before arriving at Hedo, makes it fun to hang out with/meet people when you arrive. You don't HAVE to go with a group, I just believe it is the best way to do it! Also, just because you befriend or book with a group doesn't mean that's all the people you'll meet. The people at Hedo are extremely friendly and sometimes the people you meet will be someone you meet while standing in line for a cocktail at the bar. You can search on this site to find groups, or the Hedonism website or DennyP. Highly recommend Hedo!
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  11. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by The Timidtwo View Post
    Looking to socialize
    If one were to assume erotic socialization, from a non-swinging participation perspective, would Desire be preferred?

    Obviously, our first time considering a resort of this nature....

    After a foray at a conservative Cancun resort, considering CO, as well the atmosphere described in Google queries of the resorts commonly discussed in threads here, but swingers we're not, although other activities sound enticing.

    Not into a hardcore, collegian party scene, but we don't belong in the geriatric ward, either.

    Travel dates are latter part of June, if relevant, and the general area chosen based on departure city.... I'm a little hesitant to book through our regular agent, to further the level of general conservatism.

    Any input would be appreciated.

  12. #12
    Registered User NWWACouple's Avatar
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    We've not been to Hedo yet (first trip coming up in June ), but we've been to Deisre a few times. Like Hedo, Desire will vary a lot by week, but normally the days are pretty laid back. Its not until about 4pm that things heat up. At that point nearly everyone moves up to the hot tub for the daily meat market. It does get pretty fun/crazy up there, but there are also a lot of people just seeking out their nightly conquest. Most people go get ready for dinner after that. The nightly entertainment always has an erotic theme (the foam party is amazing) and after some dancing people tend to go do their thing or head back to the hot tub.

    We aren't really swingers (though we do enjoy lifestyle parties - we call it "lifestyle light"), and we always had a good time. Its never been a high pressure thing from our experience (in fact most lifestylers we've met are have been great people), but if being around swingers make you uncomfortable or if being hit on/propositioned would offend you it may not be the best place to go.
    Last edited by NWWACouple; 04-08-2014 at 09:13 PM. Reason: spelling

  13. #13
    Quote Originally Posted by NWWACouple View Post
    Its never been a high pressure thing from our experience...
    Reassuring.

    Quote Originally Posted by NWWACouple View Post
    being around swingers make you uncomfortable
    Can't say that it would, but don't know if the opposite would alienate.

    Is everyone at Desires into swinging?

    Quote Originally Posted by NWWACouple View Post
    if being hit on/propositioned would offend you
    Haha.

    A story could be told, but our recent trip solidified that fantasy remain fantasy, which suits us both fine.

    We're not swingers, nor will we be, but that doesn't dissuade from being in an environment where present, as the other aspects and atmosphere sound enticing.

    Wouldn't want either of us feel uncomfortable by not partaking, since all else sounds a good time and does address certain aspects of fantasy.

    That said, are we on the wrong track considering resorts of this nature?

  14. #14
    Registered User NWWACouple's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nobodiesnowhere View Post
    Can't say that it would, but don't know if the opposite would alienate.
    Honestly, yes, saying no will alienate some. There are usually a few that are just looking for the next conquest. They probably won't be rude about it, but they are going to move on. If you're up front and open about what you're into and what you're not, most are still happy to spend time with you (our experience anyway).

    Desire isn't 100% swingers, but its a pretty high percentage and, as the atmosphere gets more erotic at events, the percent goes up. There are also quite a few like us who pretty much just play together most of the time.

    If you're open minded and not easily offended you're not on the wrong track. Just be sure you're both on the same page and keep the communication going.

    If you have other specific Desire questions, feel free to send us a PM.

  15. #15
    Registered User ColonelPanic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nobodiesnowhere View Post
    That said, are we on the wrong track considering resorts of this nature?
    I don't think so. My wife and I took our first 5 trips to Hedo as 100% non-swingers, and we had a great time. We were asked a few times, and when we'd tell them no, they'd either head off into the sunset or they'd stick around anyhow because we were fun to hang out with. It is well known that there are both swingers and nudists at Hedo, and the two groups get along swimmingly, from all I have observed in 10 years of traveling there.

    That said, there is absolutely the sexual atmosphere around you. It is completely normal for one of the entertainers to get a woman on stage and then pretend to have sex with her (clothes on, of course). "The party" tends to coalesce and move around the resort through various times of the day. If you want quiet, or just to be at the edge of the party, there is always room to do so.

    I tell people all the time, "It's your vacation" and I mean it. If you want to play, you'll have the opportunity, most likely. If you want to socialize, you can do that. Read a book? Go ahead. Stay up all night doing shots? Go for it! In bed by 10pm and up to watch the sunset? Have fun. No one is going to judge you on what your vacation looks like, and they'll expect the same in return.

    Coincidentally, we are travelers in the last half of June each year, so if you do decide on Hedo, there's a good chance we'll run into you, and I assure you that myself and all of our group members that I know would never consider a non-swinger unwelcome to the party.
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