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Thread: Clues that someone wants to play?

  1. #1
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    Clues that someone wants to play?

    We've been to Hedo twice and are headed there again soon. We've played a little so we aren't prudes by any means, but one question is on my mind that I'm hoping to get an answer for. One thing I love about H is how friendly everyone is. However people in the lifestyle seem to post that they seem to pick up clues when talking to others. I'm always the last to realize what is going on and just enjoy myself which can be good and bad. (Especially after drinking) Anyway I wish I could get some advice so I would know if I'm leading someone (girl or guy) on unintentionally. Ran into that a little last year and got into some uncomfortable situations... Any advice out there?

  2. #2
    Registered User sabinaandscott's Avatar
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    Direct approach is good..."do you want to play?" respect the answer either yes or no. If you try to read clues you will be wrong more than right, so the direct question may be best...and again respect the answer.
    For a guy imagine High School all over...if the girl had said directly what she wanted we would have all been more active sexually...the subtle clues woosh right over our heads...I can;t think of any other advice for how to pick up clues. If anyone else has a "secret" clue...please let us know too!
    Last edited by sabinaandscott; 05-28-2013 at 07:45 PM.
    Sabina and Scott
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  3. #3
    Registered User pbartell's Avatar
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    Love this thread...we too aren't in the lifestyle, but love to be naked and be social, sometimes...at our favorite spot, Sandals Royal Caribbean Resort and Private Island, yes this Sandals has a designated clothing optional section on the Private Island. Unusual for the Sandals franchise. And lately, we've been how do I say this, felt like we've been approached to swing? Again, I'm the one who is clueless and can't read into anything, whilst my wife, she reads into EVERYTHING. We don't want to come across as rude or anti-social for those that just want to be friendly in a non-sexual way, so we'll be keeping an eye on this thread for additional schooling. Irie!

  4. #4
    Registered User banddre's Avatar
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    After talking with another couple for a while and feeling them out (up?) a little, our standard question is "what are you guys into?"

    It can be taken harmlessly. If the answer is "tennis" or "Nascar" then we leave it at that. If the answer is something more sexual, which it usually is, then we go from there.

    We asked this to a couple we had met and were hanging out with, and really clicking with, on Haulover one afternoon a couple years ago. The guy got an erection as he looked at his wife with a big smile. Needless to say, that answered the question fairly directly.
    Hedo 3x2. Desire Cancun. Desire Cabo. Cap d'agde. Orient Beach. Sea Mountain Inn. Hidden Beach. Punta Serena.

  5. #5
    Registered User CopNkitten's Avatar
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    In the regular world, "clues" are fine.
    At hedo, they just dont work.
    If your in the lifestyle say so.
    We let people know when we are interested in them then leave the ball in thier court.
    If people misread your friendliness, and never ask, thats thier fault.
    Cop..
    Co-Hosts of kitten + angel's 15th Annual Spring Fling April 9th - 16th, 2022 (We will be onsite 4/7/22 - 4/18/22) http://www.kittennangel.com/

  6. #6
    Registered User HedoJoe's Avatar
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    Hell, Mrs. HJ just outright asks people on the bus or in the hot tub or at the pool on the way there if they are in the lifestyle.
    Joe & Ellen
    Desire Pearl - April 18-26, 2023
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  7. #7
    Registered User Naughty Nudists's Avatar
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    While we are on the subject of "asking".It is most appropriate for good communication to politely ask and avoid hurt feelings or be butting into something where you are not really welcome.For instance,as a "naughty nudist" couple,we had an overture from a lady who was with a guy and all I was able to muster on the spot was "sorry".Couldn't go into all the details about us not being in the lifestyle etc at the time and am sorry if I hurt her feelings.They were a likeable couple and we honestly would like to hang out with them later.Then we had that Vinnie experience that would have easily been avoided had someone just come out and approached the subject with a "Soooo,how long have you guys been in the lifestyle?"That would get the ball rolling without being overly direct.Then you have an opportunity to say you are or aren't in at all.For those of you that are in but are not interested it gives you a nice "out" to tell a little fib if that's what you want to do.Just sayin".It is nice to be asked,though!
    NN

  8. #8
    Registered User pbartell's Avatar
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    @banddre: Yup, that would be us, except we don't play tennis...more likely our response would be along the lines of "dancing, fine wine and food, and NASCAR". Interesting comment on Haulover...We really like Haulover when visiting South Florida...but now we have a blacklist:

    http://www.tripadvisor.com/ShowUserR...h_Florida.html

  9. #9
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    I like that it seems the general consensus is that at least at Hedo people will just be forthright. Sometimes I just never know...and have been caught off guard. Guessing when a woman wants to give you a massage at the pool that maybe it's time to pay attention... Ha ha. Love the comments from all. This site is such a great place to get honest feedback from a variety of such wonderful people!

  10. #10
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    As someone in the lifestyle, yet who has not been to Hedo ( TOMORROW WOO HOO!) just ask. "Are you in the lifestyle?" Those who aren't will answer, and I imagine if they are at hedo they won't be offended. If they are in, well bobs your Uncle!

    In a place like hedo I imagine its a legitimate question, and no cause for offense.

  11. #11
    Registered User EastWest's Avatar
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    Cool RE: Clues that someone wants to play?

    Just for the record: if you see us at Hedo, then we want to play. Just sayin'

    EastWest

  12. #12
    Registered User Jointlock's Avatar
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    We are back on 6/22 for our 4th trip in 5 years. We are lifestylers, and a direct but polite approach is fine. The Mrs. and I agree that upon check in the resort should issue (and it should be worn as a mandatory item while on property) a silicone bracelet for every guest. Color coded as follows: red: nudist couple only, green: lifestyle couple, both straight, half green - half pink: lifestyle couple wife is bi, orange: single vinnie or wally, and of course gold: single female unicorn !

  13. #13
    Registered User Naughty Nudists's Avatar
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    On the surface that sounds like a fine idea but some of us would not want to be excluded from forming friendships with others because of our or their particular "classification".
    NN

  14. #14
    Registered User HedoJoe's Avatar
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    Just what the resort wants to do.......classify people. What guy is going to tell the front desk to give them an orange bracelet because they intend to be a vinny or a wally? What ever happened to conversation where you talk to people and find out what their interests are?
    Joe & Ellen
    Desire Pearl - April 18-26, 2023
    Hedonism II - July 18-26, 2023
    Desire Pearl - September 5-13. 2023
    Nile Lifestyle Cruise - January 26 - February 8, 2024

    AFF & Kasidie- Empty_Nesters
    SLS - CT_empty_nesters
    SDC - emptynesters1
    http://www.sdc.com?ref=9857

  15. #15
    Registered User Jointlock's Avatar
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    Guys, take a chill pill. It is an idea we know is never going to happen. But even if it did, maybe the non lifestylers would appreciate not being asked to play, but only approached as friends.

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