Hedo manners

[Talisman]

For anyone who is curious, there's no real person behind these spam accounts, just like the spam emails most people get on a regular basis. Its all generated by software designed to randomly attack a message board if it can get access. The best solution is usually to change the authentication methods that are used when you create an account, making it less likely the spam software can successfully create a valid account. Sometimes there'll be a person who creates the account, but the email used is never valid for more than a few minutes.

Unfortunately, there are talented assholes out there who excel at annoying others this way.

If anyone is interested I could go into more detail, but the bottom line is the spammer isn't a real person so they aren't going to read any responses, the person who wrote that software is hoping you'll click on their links and either get more internet traffic or infect your computer with something.

[CopNkitten]

So lets just kick thier spamming butts off here.
Cop..

[phillygirl22]

I'm guessing if we charged $ for access, it would eliminate most. But then Chris would have to manage that part, which is tough.

[clary1]

On our first trip to Hedo we met a couple who were full of mixed messages (not massages). For example, They would talk about how disgusting it was to see PDA's and then they would be asking my wife if she swallows. They were the first couple we met on our first trip. Thankfully they were not the "norm" at Hedo. But mixed messages are just confusing and not very good manners in our opinion.

[MikeCarrie]

A mixed message to me me ( which we had a few ) meant WE were not interested in going further. We would treat those people just as if we were at a clothed party and they were just talking to make conversation. And dont get me wrong, we liked them alot, there was just not going to be any activities.
On another note we were gettting jiggy at the hot tub and a very built and very well hung Jamaican gentleman ask if he could join us ("Can I get some of that man?") We both very politly said no and he left.
Those were the highlights of our etiquette experiances

[smallandtall]

I have read this post several times to make sure I'm getting it right because if taken literally, you would never go back to Hedo. While I will agree that respect is the over arching concept, Hedo is still a very social environment - especially the nude pool. Playful/flirty touching ("verbal?" and non verbal) happens often. Now, there is a big difference between a playful "accidentally" rubbing up against someone when squeezing up to the bar, or holding a hand on someone a little longer than necessary to guide them past, than a creepy, predatory pawing... But most people know the difference. It's those that don't that need to be dealt with appropriately. Having said that, it's a requirement to be selective, but it appears from your post that you are hermetically sealed for the first week and interaction from anyone requires an interview process and a stack of release forms.

We've been to Hedo a bunch of times and know how it works, but for the sake of any newbies out there, would you care to clarify your position? It comes off as a bit extreme.

Didn't see this response until now (Oops, sorry!).

Some clarification: We went to Hedo twice before. That was the first week (in 2010) and second week (in 2011) I mentioned above.
So no, that didn't mean to imply that we normally go there for two weeks at a time and only play once during the second week. :-)
It just means that we are *very* clear in our communication, both verbal and non-verbal to those approaching us physically and/or verbally.

With both of us being non-native English speakers, non-US natives and even by Dutch standards very outspoken, our approach is of course relatively limited when interacting with native English speakers (who also originate from other countries than ours). So yes, we can come across as very direct, especially by people from cultures where that kind of directness is not normal in everyday interaction between people. Being Dutch (and Czech) that's a clear part of who and what we are, and we also communicate like that with others at Hedo.
So far that has given us plenty of opportunities of getting to meet interesting people (several of which we are still in touch with) and very little miscommunication from those we are not interested in.

Sorry for the misunderstanding!

[panther]

Just our humble opinion....but not everyone that turns down an offer of play turns it down because they don't like the other couple....sometimes it is just bad timing...of the month or any number of other things....geez people, please don't take offense but if my other half has a flare up of her IBS, then play for anyone...me included is off the table that day......just saying. If your offer is politely declined, it may be due to any number of reasons...many that some people just don't want to talk about.

[HailCaesar]

random touch?

NO to the random touch! I met a couple on my trip as a single guy and the wife was a touchy feely type but in NO WAY were they swingers. They are Hedo regulars and never stray from each other but will talk all day to everyone at the resort. Just super friendly in their case.

If you meet a couple you should openly ask. You can lead into it by asking questions about them joining you to the nude pool if you aren't there and there are other ways to lead in I'm sure. You could also say that the 2 of you are into the lifestyle and that is a subtly way of talking about it. To not seem rude don't walk away from them immediately if they say they aren't but wait at least 30-40 seconds to be polite.

[frasan3871]

Ok I have a question lets say you are at the nude pool hot tub bar or playing some kind of game whatever every one is having a good time. There is never any touching between any one but your spouse and you? I would find that hard to be leave. again we have never been yet me and wife flirt and touch people all the time. Is it different because we will be naked? Thanks

[smallandtall]

Ok I have a question lets say you are at the nude pool hot tub bar or playing some kind of game whatever every one is having a good time. There is never any touching between any one but your spouse and you? I would find that hard to be leave. again we have never been yet me and wife flirt and touch people all the time. Is it different because we will be naked? Thanks

Having returned from Hedo today, I can answer your questions very simply with this example: there was a Pakistani guy this past week who behaved obnoxiously and went over the limit several times.
He used the same approach every time. He would get into the hot tub (with the two women that he paid the holiday for), then approached a couple (female-male or female-female) who were getting into eachother. Usually he would approach the female who had her back to him, although I saw him touch women who were being serviced by their playpartner in such a position that they were pinned between the hot tub wall or lying on their back on the edge of the hot tub. After being shied away by the people involved, he would often return quicly afterwards, making sexual remarks and showing in a pretty aggressive way that he wasn't done yet.

When he touched my girlfriend while making a remark along the lines of "when he is away I will do more with you", I made clear in no uncertain way that he would probably wake up in hospital if he did that. I saw lots of people give him the same response. So approach respectfully, and realize that touching is not the best way to get to know others. Talk to them instead and be clear about your desires and make sure you get clear what their desires are before touching!

[frasan3871]

hey thanks but I meant in a more playful way not like a pervert . because if someone were to do that to my wife she would probable bite his cock off. but if someone was at the bar and he or she put there hand on her fine ass she would be turned on by it. thanks

[CopNkitten]

Having returned from Hedo today, I can answer your questions very simply with this example: there was a Pakistani guy this past week who behaved obnoxiously and went over the limit several times.
He used the same approach every time. He would get into the hot tub (with the two women that he paid the holiday for), then approached a couple (female-male or female-female) who were getting into eachother. Usually he would approach the female who had her back to him, although I saw him touch women who were being serviced by their playpartner in such a position that they were pinned between the hot tub wall or lying on their back on the edge of the hot tub. After being shied away by the people involved, he would often return quicly afterwards, making sexual remarks and showing in a pretty aggressive way that he wasn't done yet.

When he touched my girlfriend while making a remark along the lines of "when he is away I will do more with you", I made clear in no uncertain way that he would probably wake up in hospital if he did that. I saw lots of people give him the same response. So approach respectfully, and realize that touching is not the best way to get to know others. Talk to them instead and be clear about your desires and make sure you get clear what their desires are before touching!

I think you showed great restraint.
Sometimes people just need to be properly "educated"
Cop..

[Brian&Terri]

Ok I have a question lets say you are at the nude pool hot tub bar or playing some kind of game whatever every one is having a good time. There is never any touching between any one but your spouse and you? I would find that hard to be leave. again we have never been yet me and wife flirt and touch people all the time. Is it different because we will be naked? Thanks

Just because you are nude at Hedo doesn't mean you are free to touch someone. Logic would tell me that if you talked and flirt with someone you would have a very clean idea if they would be fine with it. Just because you're in a place where friends touch or other may have a PDA doesn't mean "you" are part of that group yet. Flirt with your mouth not your hands....until you have clearance.

[frasan3871]

Just because you are nude at Hedo doesn't mean you are free to touch someone. Logic would tell me that if you talked and flirt with someone you would have a very clean idea if they would be fine with it. Just because you're in a place where friends touch or other may have a PDA doesn't mean "you" are part of that group yet. Flirt with your mouth not your hands....until you have clearance.

Ok I did not mean that we were going to be fondling people . And of course we would flirt and talking first. I am sorry it seemed that way.

[critter2]

We have seen one or two strange ones every trip over the years,had one guy that was trying to get as close to couples as he could get and then he would start wacking off,security finally got rid of him!!