two irish guys walk out of a bar, it could happen
two irish guys walk out of a bar, it could happen
It could, but I don't see it in the near future!!!!!!
I went to the urologist for a check up and was nervous when I found out that my regular physician was out and I would be seen by a new lady doctor that had just joined their practice. Later she told me that I would have to quit masturbating, when I asked why she said "because I am trying to give you an exam"
Just a bunch of fucking idiots
Hedo Amigos/Wild Women Vacations October 5-11
Okay I am half Irish and hubby here is full Irish. No that could never happen...Originally Posted by bare1s
Stumble possibly....
Crawl likely.....
Out in handcuffs definately....lol
Last edited by bibabe; 03-18-2011 at 10:26 AM.
So do whatever it takes
'Cause you can't rewind a moment in this life
H3
April 27-May 4 2008
April 24-May 2 2009
April 23-May 1 2010
_R.I.P. H3
H2
April 1st-10 2011
March 30-April 7 2012
March 28th-April 6th 2013
March 27th-April 5th 2014
Still Innocent:
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?
Sunbathing in the Buff
A man was sunbathing in the buff at the beach. For the sake of civility, and to keep it from getting sunburned, he had a hat over his private parts.
A woman walks past and says, snickering, "If you were a gentleman you'd lift your hat."
He raised an eyebrow and replied, "If you weren't so ugly it would lift itself".
Parents and son on a Nude Beach
Two parents take their son on a vacation and go to a nude beach. The father goes for a walk on the beach and the son goes and plays in the water. The son comes running up to his mom and says, "Mommy, I saw ladies with boobies a lot bigger than yours!"
The mom says, "The bigger they are, the dumber they are." So he goes back to play. Several minutes later, he comes running back and says, "Mommy, I saw men with dingers a lot bigger than Daddy's!"
The mom says, "The bigger they are, the dumber they are." Once again the son goes back to play.
A short time later, he comes running back and says, "Mommy, I just saw Daddy talking to the dumbest lady I ever saw, and the more and more he talked, the dumber and dumber he got!"
A guy and his wife have plans to go hunting early in the morning. The alarm goes off at 4 a.m. and he tries to wake her up. She rolls over and tells him she's too tired and has changed her mind. He does everything he can to get her out of bed but it's not working. Finally frustrated he tells her he's going out to load the dog in the truck and when he gets back inside if she's not ready to go she will have to choose between a blow job or anal sex. After a few minutes he comes back in and she's still in bed so he asks her what she's decided to do. She says theres no way she's getting out of bed and she's not having anal sex so she'll give him a blow job. he drops his pants and she starts to go at it but after a couple of seconds she stops and says this tastes like shit' He smiles at her and says yeah old blue didn't want to go huntin either
EEEwwww ok thatwas just nasty LOL
O K how about this one. A judge is presiding over Mickey Mouses divorce hearing. After Mickey has finished pleading his case the judge tells Mickey he's sorry but even if Minnie is weird it's not grounds for a divorce. Mickey looks at the judge and says I didn't say she was weird I said she was fucking goofy.
lol heard thata few years ago and it always gets me going, love it..
RE: Jokes
Proud to be a Swede
A Swede is drinking in a bar when he gets a call on his cell phone. He hangs up, grinning from ear to ear, and orders a round of drinks for everybody in the bar announcing his wife had produced a
typical Swedish baby boy weighing 25 pounds.
Nobody can believe that any new baby can weigh in at 25 pounds, but the Swede just shrugs, "That's about average back home, folks......like I said, my boy's a typical Swedish baby boy."
Congratulations showered him from all around, and many exclamations of "WOW"....one woman actually fainted due to sympathy pains.
Two weeks later he returns to the bar.
The bartender says, "Say you're the father of that typical Swedish baby that weighed 25 pounds at birth. Everybody's been making bets about how big he'd be in two weeks. So how much does he weigh now?"
The proud father answers, "Seventeen pounds."
The bartender is puzzled, concerned, and a little suspicious. "What happened? He already weighed 25 pounds the day he was born!"
The Swedish father takes a long swig of Aquavit, wipes his lips on his shirt sleeve, leans into the bartender and proudly says.....
"We had him circumcised."
****************************
Cheers,
D & L
July 2009: Hedonism III
July 2011: Hedonism II
http://69eastwest69.tumblr.com
RE: Jokes
First Grade Harry
A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?"
Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!"
Ms. Brooks had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.
While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed.
Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Harry: "9."
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Harry: "36."
And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know.
The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade."
Ms. Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions."
The principal and Harry both agreed.
Ms. Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?"
Harry, after a moment: "Legs."
Ms. Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
The principal wondered why would she ask such a question!
Harry replied: "Pockets."
Ms. Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
Harry: "Pants."
Ms. Brooks: What starts with a C, ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?"
Harry: "Coconut."
The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open.
Ms. Brooks: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"
The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer,
Harry replied, "Bubble gum."
Ms. Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?"
Harry: "Shake hands."
The principal was trembling.
Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?"
Harry: "Firetruck."
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong...... "
****************************
Cheers,
D & L
July 2009: Hedonism III
July 2011: Hedonism II
http://69eastwest69.tumblr.com
Hahaha... Well put us back in the 1st then!! LOL
Buck is sitting on the front porch drinking a beer with his wife
Bucks say how i love you so very much
My wife says is that you or the beer talking
Bucks say i was talking to my beer
lol silly boy...Buck is sitting on the front porch drinking a beer with his wife
Bucks say how i love you so very much
My wife says is that you or the beer talking
Bucks say i was talking to my beer
there once was aguy named buck
who drank so much he couldnt fuck
so he said with a grin as he wiped off his chin
well at least I can still suck
I am more of a licker than a sucker.
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