First Timer Single Guy dec 28 to Jan 3

Hello all,

My GF and I had booked a trip to Couples for Dec 28 to Jan 3, however due to certain circumstances we are no longer a “couple”....therefore instead of canceling the trip alltogether, I figured I would make lemons out of lemonade and still go. I was looking for a fun party resort and figured Hedo fit the bill. I have done my research on this forum and understand the “dos” and “dont’s” for single guys.....I am a very laid back 34 year old and am open minded, however the only expectation I have for Hedo is that I will have fun and meet new ppl.

So, here’s another one of these threads - as a single guy that week, should I go or cancel and go to a different hotel? What should I bring, expect, do, don’t do??

Thank you all in advance for your advice - I have never been to a lifestyle resort as a couple, let alone single, therefore I am a little nervous and want to ensure that I approach it the correct way.

YOU ABSOLUTELY MUST GO!
I have been as a single guy the last 10 trips. I love the environment, the people and the camaraderie...Nude pool is a great place to meet people.
by mid day the resort games are usually going on at the pool and folks have a had a few drinks. People seem to be more talkative.

The correct way is to be kind and respectful to people...just like we are all supposed to do every day :-)
Speak to people without an 'angle'...just like you're at backyard bbq but with your clothes off LOL...Get to know people without the intention of hooking up...sex is always better when you like the person or person(s) you're playing with!
In my experience, if a couple is interested, the husband will approach you separately. While I am certain there are exceptions to everyone's rule, NEVER start discussing sex with the couple. Let them bring it up to you. Most couples will ask if you are lifestyle if they are interested, acknowledge honestly.

Honesty and Transparency go a long way.

Do not touch anyone unless you are invited to touch!

There is no template to the Lifestyle or Swinging. Everyone has their own likes and dislikes. There may be some commonalities among folks and usually those folks hang in the same group.

Single guys sometimes get a bad rap from couples, but the truth is there are a large number of lifestyle couples that entertain respectful men in and out of their bedrooms.

This forum is awesome. I've been a member for 7 years, but it does not reflect the opinion of the entire resort, the guests of the resort, nor should you let it dictate what type experience you may have at Hedo...go see for yourself.

The Cardinal Rule is "NO MEANS NO" Never, Ever violate this rule

Have Fun!

Go! We will be there the same time, Dec. 28th - Jan 3rd, and will happily have a drink with you and show you the ropes. We met another single guy last year at NYE and had a blast with him! He is coming back single again, so you won't be the only one. Best part of Hedo is the people, you won't find any other place more open and inviting regardless of relationship status :)

Thank you both for the encouragement. I am definitely leaning heavily towards going as my room and flight are already booked. I understand respect and I am certainly not the aggressive or pushy type, so I a good there. If I get laid while there, great, but honestly the goal is to have fun and meet cool people in a great environment - just can’t find a better spot for fun in Negril. I will continue to peruse these forums until the trip so I can learn more! And I will def take you up on that drink, kelsey&mike. I am definitely nervous though about the whole trip!

I think you have the best attitude possible for a single guy - go with no agenda other than to meet people, laugh and have fun. Follow FlFitguy's advice and you'll be fine. We love hanging out with Single guys who are respectful, fun & who hang out as 'one of the gang' without being pushy. This approach will actually work in your favor. Word will spread quickly amongst couples if you are non-threatening & cool....it will also spread quickly the other way too. Once you have a reputation for being non-aggressive, non pushy - you'll actually probably get invited into things! :)

So I found some advice I posted over a year ago....Past me seems to be more detailed. Hahaha. I've copied and pasted it here:

If you 'take sex off the table' & just go with a friendly, social attitude, you will have a great time. Just plan to go, to hang out, and to make friends. Don't bring up sex....if couples or single women are interested, they will ask you. And, if you've been respectful, trustworthy and fun hanging out in the pool all day, it may pan out for you in the bedroom too - it's just not a guarantee. Women are not looking to replace their husbands - the ones interested in single guys are looking for some sexual variety & friendship - but that's usually it. And as long as you respect the relationship between couples & understand the dynamic, you'll do just fine. I will tell you I am ALWAYS on the lookout for a GOOD single guy - especially if he has experience in this lifestyle already.

Definition of 'Good': Clean, intelligent, friendly, will show both me & my man respect, nice teeth & breath (Lol - I live in England now...so I feel I have to say that.), not aggressive, doesn't stare or make sexual comments as an introduction, is carefree and content to have a great time outside the bedroom, & doesn't 'wolf pack up' with other single guys (this is such an immediate turn off)...and I am sure there are others that I just can't think of at the moment. Lol.

Thanks for the awesome advice and encouragement. I think I will fit in fine, I just want to go and have a good time and meet new people from across the world

Sometimes I wonder if something ever happened to my wife if I would be able to adapt as a single guy at Hedo....therefore I try to be as nice as possible to them because who knows, any one of us guys could be in that situation. Good luck, you will have a blast.

I think you should go. I've been to Hedo four times, once as a single guy. If you have a good attitude, you will not regret your choice. Talk to everyone and be social is my best advice. (Send me a PM if you want to know more about my solo experience.)