Any tips on how to just "let go" of my previous trip body image jitters

This will be our third trip to Hedo and by now you would think that I, the female, would be OK with my body image. In reality I know " Ken and Barbie" are not the norm at Hedo but for the life of me I can not seem to let go and just enjoy the hedo experience without worrying about how I look to others. I am 42 years old with a loving husband of 19 years who adores my naked Hedo body and we are in the lifestyle . I am told that I have to stop over thinking and enjoy and stop worrying. Please please any tips out there on how to overcome the pre trip body image jitters (without the use of excessive amounts of alcohol or recreational drugs as we are not into that)???! Anyone with the same worries as myself? We are at Hedo Jan 19th to 27th. Thanks for listening!

We all go through it luv xoxoxoxo

I don't know... but if you do get a solution... please spread it around!

I think we all know women with body image problems... and some men with the same issues. As much as some people say that they don't care what people think, they're often putting on a brave face for others (because they care if people think they care about what people think). I found myself shopping for a Bowflex Trainer after I returned from our maiden Hedo trip last year because I'd like to improve my physique (for reference, I didn't buy it and still have the dad body I had last year).

Getting hit on and beautiful women giving me the time of day, helped me... and I think back to those nights when my confidence waivers.

The only thing you can be sure of, is that worrying about it won't help you. People will think what they think. Hedo is one of the most accepting places on earth and at least you'll find few people who are judgmental when you're at your most vulnerable.

We both wish we looked like we did when we were 25.....but a couple decades does change you a bit...lol

For us, we try to eat healthy, go to the gym when we can (we are not gym rats) and enjoy life. Are we perfect, no...side note she is in my eyes...but, who cares. We have a little too much fat, scars, hair growing places we never though possible, faded tattoos not in as good shape as we would dream of, etc. In our opinion this is life....and life is what it is all about...enjoy it...corny saying but it is true...Everybody dies, but not everybody truly lives...

Do not worry about the way you look, you are what you are, Hedo is part of truly living...letting yourself be out there and just having fun. Who cares what others think...you and your spouse is all that matters and if you are happy, you are good.

We have good friends that went to a resort in Negril with a few other couples. One day they took a boat trip and they cruised past hedo. They came back with stories....I heard that there were a bunch of old fat people running around nude with lots of people on floats and 3 deep at the bar. They thought that would be a horrible vacation and were shocked that people did that....they then complained that their vacation was ok, but boring. The bars close at 10 at their resort, everybody seemed to read books all day, you had to dress up each night for dinner and besides the 3 couples that went with them, they had limited interaction with other guests...could not even get a volley ball game started...the drinks were weak, etc.

Do not worry about it...Enjoy you trip, have fun and love life!

toohorny nailed it...

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Originally Posted by toohorny

We both wish we looked like we did when we were 25.....but a couple decades does change you a bit...lol

For us, we try to eat healthy, go to the gym when we can (we are not gym rats) and enjoy life. Are we perfect, no...side note she is in my eyes...but, who cares. We have a little too much fat, scars, hair growing places we never though possible, faded tattoos not in as good shape as we would dream of, etc. In our opinion this is life....and life is what it is all about...enjoy it...corny saying but it is true...Everybody dies, but not everybody truly lives...

Do not worry about the way you look, you are what you are, Hedo is part of truly living...letting yourself be out there and just having fun. Who cares what others think...you and your spouse is all that matters and if you are happy, you are good.

We have good friends that went to a resort in Negril with a few other couples. One day they took a boat trip and they cruised past hedo. They came back with stories....I heard that there were a bunch of old fat people running around nude with lots of people on floats and 3 deep at the bar. They thought that would be a horrible vacation and were shocked that people did that....they then complained that their vacation was ok, but boring. The bars close at 10 at their resort, everybody seemed to read books all day, you had to dress up each night for dinner and besides the 3 couples that went with them, they had limited interaction with other guests...could not even get a volley ball game started...the drinks were weak, etc.

Do not worry about it...Enjoy you trip, have fun and love life!

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Being self-conscious is something we all go through. Men and woman alike. The truth of the matter is we almost always critique ourselves much harsher than those around us. If it makes you feel better my wife and I have been to Hedo three times now and Desire twice. Now my wife is drop dead gorgeous which doesnt help my insecurities any, but on this last trip to Hedo a beautifull much younger woman approached me and started chatting away. We had a great conversation and she even got a little handsy with me (which i loved, who wouldnt). But when she walked away i turned to my wife and said "her husband must really want to get with you". My wife said in response that maybe this girl just wanted to get with you did you even think of that. To this day even after multiple trips i still look in the mirror and wonder what anyone would see in this...lol. Someday i hope to be over it and just relax but i certainly feel your pain. Just remember we never see oursleves the way others do. All we see is the flaws and imperfections. Truly genuine people will see the personality and if it comes with an amazing body well thats just a plus!
Be the kind fun person im sure you are and rest assured that others are just looking at the best parts of your body!

Well, before we comment we are going to need several pictures both clothed and nude to help generate a plan that best fits you....

Hehe.

There is no secret remedy for this. You just do it. I get more jitters for just being there, not necessarily being naked, but the excitement jitters, so that kind of overtakes my body image jitters. :)

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Originally Posted by Ridncouple

Well, before we comment we are going to need several pictures both clothed and nude to help generate a plan that best fits you....

Hehe.

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I like the way you think.... I second that motion......lol....

I had the gitters the first couple of trips.... So much so I would wrap myself in a towel to go to the bathroom... Now, I strut my stuff and I'm proud of it... It took me awhile to realize, that being sexy didn't mean I had to look like "Barbie" it means being confident and comfortable with yourself... To heck with anyone else...

People at Hedo aren't looking at people's sizes they are looking at that nice smile, the colour of your eyes, and nice personality people have...

We struggled with the same feelings on our past trips to Hedo and Desire, and likely will again on our next trip. But interestingly, those insecure feelings went away soon after we joined in the festivities at the nude pool. We struck up conversations quickly and had a great time with folks of all ages and shapes. I think the fact that people are so personable at Hedo, no matter what, actually gets rid of the insecurity better than anything else. We figured that people get along better at Hedo because there are no barriers. You hang it all out (quite literally) and cannot hide behind fancy clothes, etc. You are yourself, and when you make friends at Hedo, you realize that they genuinely like you for who you are, not what they perceive about you based on cars, clothes, money, etc. It's not the body that people focus on so much as the perceptions about you. (although, checking out nekkid bodies is a wonderful past-time!) Remove those other things, and all that's left is you. What a comfort that was for us. After that, it was PARTY ON!

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Originally Posted by Ontario

I had the gitters the first couple of trips.... So much so I would wrap myself in a towel to go to the bathroom... Now, I strut my stuff and I'm proud of it... It took me awhile to realize, that being sexy didn't mean I had to look like "Barbie" it means being confident and comfortable with yourself... To heck with anyone else...

People at Hedo aren't looking at people's sizes they are looking at that nice smile, the colour of your eyes, and nice personality people have...

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I second the quote about the smile,eyes,and personality.It's what matters more than anything.Being a great conversationalist at Hedo is GOLDEN......

Thank you thank you for all your replies and words of wisdom ....I truly appreciate other people's perspective and really I had no idea so many people are like me including men! Now you have asked for pictures I think I may be brave enough to post some on here....when I see my own pictures I see every imperfection from mummy tummy to the large varicose veins on my legs. When I get to Hedo it takes 3 days to pluck courage up to just talk....I hide behind a good book so no one is looking at me lol. When I get in the nude pool it feels like high school....do I dare break into a circle of people talking???? I know they don't know me but my unreasonableft side of my brain is yelling watch out for " clicks" they won'the like you and the small brave part of my brain is saying push in with those 40DDDs and say Hi! I wish you guys were going the same time as us as I would love to have a chat and drink ....I have been told to do body shots and that I could probably hold two shots in my boobs lol...I have never ever done that before! Again many thanks for taking the time to reply. ����

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Originally Posted by jchotcouple

Thank you thank you for all your replies and words of wisdom ....I truly appreciate other people's perspective and really I had no idea so many people are like me including men! Now you have asked for pictures I think I may be brave enough to post some on here....when I see my own pictures I see every imperfection from mummy tummy to the large varicose veins on my legs. When I get to Hedo it takes 3 days to pluck courage up to just talk....I hide behind a good book so no one is looking at me lol. When I get in the nude pool it feels like high school....do I dare break into a circle of people talking???? I know they don't know me but my unreasonableft side of my brain is yelling watch out for " clicks" they won'the like you and the small brave part of my brain is saying push in with those 40DDDs and say Hi! I wish you guys were going the same time as us as I would love to have a chat and drink ....I have been told to do body shots and that I could probably hold two shots in my boobs lol...I have never ever done that before! Again many thanks for taking the time to reply. ����

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Most of the "cliks" we have encountered at Hedo would likely just LOVE to meet your Smilin' 40DDD's,just sayin'!So don't be shy.
If you encounter the "cold shoulder" from any little group,just move along as there's lots of nice people looking for someone to socialize with.......

By all means, please push in! A great story of ours: wife and I were hanging out in the nude pool in a "circle" of new friends. Apparently, a lady from across the pool noticed that my wife's chest was getting a bit sunburned. She made her way over to us in a hurry, shouting something like "emergency!" and brought with her a bottle of sun screen. She proceeded to, without any notice, squirt it on my wife's chest and rubbed it all in - very hot. And what an ice-breaker! We all had a great laugh at it. So, there really are no barriers at Hedo. Just push in.